So it feels like day 200 and something of March. I’m on FaceTime with my boyfriend, like we do as a ritual every night. It’s the usual conversation, “how was your day…I miss you…did you see all the TikToks I sent?” We live about five hours away, and it’s the same routine. Every text and Snapchat suddenly begins to feel forced, and the conversations are the same and lack enthusiasm. I start to think, “what if the flame is starting to die out.” But we then begin to have a challenging conversation about how we’ve been feeling lately, which we haven’t done in months. The scary thought comes up, should we break up?
Would all of this time and effort be gone to waste, or was this something I needed to do for the better of my mental health? And that got me thinking.
If you truly love someone, you will get through it. Long-distance is hard, but communication is critical, no matter how cliché it sounds. I know that older couples will say this all the time, but you have to compromise. You have to understand the situation and the fact that you are two individuals just trying to make the best of things. Always make a point to talk on the phone; I don’t mean Snapchat or text, a legit phone call once a day if you can, but at least once a week. So many things go unsaid, and context gets misunderstood through text messages. It’s so much easier to tell how someone feels when you can actually see their body language or hear the changing tones in their voice.
It doesn’t matter how long you’ve been with someone if there is no trust and patience. We’re all just trying to make sense of the world right now. They might have a job, classes, or family to take care of. All you can really do is hope that when they’re too busy to talk, you’re not continually assuming the worst of things. If you can’t trust your partner when you’re in the same town, how are you supposed to trust them hundreds of miles apart?
Fights and miscommunications are going to happen. Not everything is puppy dogs and rainbows, and that’s okay because we’re human, and that’s just what we do. But remember that you have to be able to communicate how you feel and know that they just can’t read your mind all of the time.
I see this strange time as only temporary, but although it won’t truly last forever, there is so much to learn from it. To not only learn from your partner, but yourself and how to apply these things to your family, friends, and your life. Nothing and no one is perfect, but that’s the beauty of life. There will be bumps in the road, but the joy is looking back at how you got over them and how they’ve prepared you for the future.