We had talked about this moment almost every day for three years. The day you would stand at the end of the aisle, committing your love in front of your entire family. The day you married the love of your life. I imagined that day hundreds of times. I never imagined it wouldn’t be spent with me.
It’s hard to look back on those three years we spent together. We were young–way too young to know how to appreciate what was in front of us. I am happy that you were a part of my life, but our days were numbered. Those days are gone, and now a new one has appeared. The day you will remember forever. The day you will share with her.
Years ago I fell for a curly-headed boy in an old Chevy truck. A boy that was kind and sincere. Now, I see a man who has been changed by the world. A man who is living the first day of his forever.
I am not sad. I have spent my fair share of time grieving the loss of our love, but I have grown so much as a person since then. I am not regretful, but I am nostalgic. It’s hard to pinpoint exactly how I feel because time has changed so much in our lives. You are no longer the person I once loved, nor am I still the one you loved. Time changes things, and it sure took its toll on us.
As much as I want to, it is hard for me to say that I am happy for you. I am glad that you are happy, but it is hard to be overjoyed while watching someone I loved promise forever to another.
You will likely never see this, and I am thankful for that. I don’t want you to think I am still burdened by the end us, which happened many years ago. I am now living the life I always dreamed for myself. A life that was not possible for me while we were together. Our story stopped long ago, but without its end, I would not be able to be the person I am today.
You tried to keep my dreams grounded when all I did was encourage yours. You are not the only one to blame for how harmful our time together was, and I know that I am at fault for many things. However, our relationship was toxically disguised as love. We were never meant to be, and I am thankful that our lives have led us to where we are now.
If there is one thing I wish for you, it’s that you lift your wife up instead of bringing her down. Do not devalue her, and always encourage her dreams. We may not have ended the way that we planned, but that is life. Your life will go on, just as mine will. So, hold her hand a little tighter, and don’t be so ready to let go. You deserve love, and I hope this time it is forever, just as we always dreamed it would be.