Most Ohio U students have heard the notorious urban legends surrounding the infamous Mom’s Weekend. Rumor has it that two years ago your sorority sister’s mom drunkenly sprawled across the bar at Pawpurr’s in prime position for the boys of Phi Kappa Tau to take body shots off her middle-aged stomach. I also heard from my chemistry lab TA that your ex-boyfriend’s mom came home mid-black out and accidently crawled into bed with his roommate where they supposedly hooked up until she puked all over his pillow. Ask any Bobcat for their wildest Mom’s Weekend story and surely theirs will top those aforementioned. In this edition, we ponder if inviting Mom to Athens for the weekend will result in lifelong family memories or humiliation for all involved.
Fun: Mom’s Weekend is the ideal opportunity for several things. You can introduce her to your new college friends and show her your dorm/house/apartment. You can take advantage of her wallet by going out to eat (especially great for those who are sick of dining hall food or can’t afford groceries!) and taking the obligatory trip to Wal-Mart to stock up on snacks and other provisions.
There are also various mom-friendly activities during the day where you can spend time together while helping out charities or OU student-run organizations. Some of this year’s events include the Mom’s Weekend Golf Outing, Annual Mom’s Weekend Fashion Show and the 11th Annual Mom’s Walk for a Cure which supports breast cancer research. (Check out those events and more at http://www.ohio.edu/parents/familyweekends/06.cfm).
However as the sun sinks lower in the sky, entertaining Mom becomes more difficult. Bringing your mother to a party with close friends is safe as long as you limit your alcohol consumption and secretly monitor hers as well. It would be unwise to be more intoxicated than your mom as she would most likely judge you and possibly attempt to punish you like she did that time she found a bottle of Bacardi Peach Red in your dirty clothes hamper. I also suggest the secretive monitoring method for keeping Mommy Dearest in line without her knowledge. You don’t want her going shot for shot with the former OU heavyweight wrestling champion, singing karaoke at Red Brick with the Singing Men of Ohio, or bonging beers like she did in her own college days.
If you catch her getting out of control, suggest going uptown for a snack break or asking her to walk home with you to get a jacket. This will remove her from the party, give her awhile to sober up and avoid regrettable behavior. Partying with your mom is completely possible, as long as you remain responsible and put her to bed before she embarrasses herself.
Insane: If you have a mom like mine (i.e. doesn’t drink and doesn’t approve of those who do it when they are absolutely and completely legal and in no way, shape or form, using an illegal form of identification to purchase alcohol), then Mom’s Weekend might not be the best place to have mother-daughter (or son) bonding time with her.
If she wants to come to Athens for the day, have a cookout and do all of the great day-time events listed above, then we would have a great time. The problem arises when all of these events involve drinking, especially number two party school style. Moms normally don’t like to see exactly what you do on the weekends and prefer to just believe that you stay in on Friday nights and do homework instead of going to Pawpurr’s for prime time five nights out of the week. The other scenario that can, and very possibly could, happen is exactly what the intro paragraph says: a blacked out, I-think-I’m-still-21 mom.
Horror stories have to get their start somewhere. Just take a look inside Courtside on Mom’s Weekend and you can see exactly why people are terrified of having their naïve moms visit. Dancing on the bar and even the possibility of having your mom flash your friends is enough to scar you for life. My motto on Mom’s Weekend: better safe than sorry.
The key to a successful Mom’s Weekend is moderation. Go the OU affiliated events so you can keep yourselves busy all day and avoid the perilous day drinking. Let her have a few drinks at night and feel free to have a few yourself, if that’s what both of you want to do. While bonging beers and taking mass shots aren’t the best idea, a quick game of beer pong or flip cup (by quick I mean stop before either of you feel tipsy) is enough to make her feel included in your friends and allow her to see what you do on a weekend, just on a lower scale. Just remember to keep it classy.