I don’t know about everyone else, but I was always taught at school that gossiping was bad, and seen as anti-feminist to be talking behind other girls’ backs. Yet throughout history, gossip has been used to protect women, sharing valuable information in safe environments whilst boosting female friendships. More and more research is being done, uncovering the power behind gossip, dating back to the Middle Ages. It is estimated around two-thirds of our conversations focus on personal matters. Gossip is a powerful tool for spreading information- whether it is accurate or not. It can make or break reputations and friendships, but can also solidify relationships and support communication. So, is gossip as destructive as it seems?
Oral history is a difficult one to obtain, with words being lost in history without ever being recorded. However, gossip has not always had negative connotations like it does now. The etymology of the word gossip comes from ‘godsibb’ meaning- a friend or relative in God, a person with whom one converses, usually in relation to baptism. Although it is surprising to see gossip come from religious connections, it is fitting considering that in early societies groups were formed around religion, coming together to worship, in which groups could converse more freely together.
Sociolinguistic and famous feminist academic Deborah Tannen explores female social interactions and friendships in her work. It seems from being children, girls spend more time talking than their male counterparts, using secrets specifically to solidify their friendships. Tannen argues that gossip is beneficial to female friendships. She argues that for women ‘sharing personal information is like a first step towards friendship’. Gossip and information appear to be used as a tool by women. It is used to depict closeness between groups and display to others the closeness to their friends.
Tannen acknowledges the negative connotations surrounding gossip saying this stereotyping of gossip also ‘gives women a bad rep’. However, she believes that gossip is not necessarily talking behind others’ backs. Instead, it can be talking about others’ lives, and not necessarily in a negative light. Instead, it appears it is simply a discussion. She argues that being interested in a friend’s personal life creates closeness between them. She also explores the negative sides of gossip, where conversations turn sour. She argues there must be a balance of wanting to ‘share secrets in order to form friendships and to think through problems with the need’.Female friendships are so vital in my life, and I am sure they are in yours too. There is something special about a close platonic bond with another woman that cannot be recreated. I think the conversational and understanding element is so important. So I do understand the importance of gossip. Being able to talk freely about a multitude of topics, usually personal, does bring people closer. I also completely appreciate the negative reputation gossip has. I am sure we have all fallen victim to others talking behind our backs, feeling hurt and embarrassed that others would discuss our personal lives so freely and seemingly without care. Yet, I am also confident we have all probably gossiped with friends, not intending to cause any harm, instead just communicating and discussing information. Female friendships are something to be appreciated, and as Tannen emphasised, gossip can be a way to nourish these friendships, but it needs to be handled with care and appreciation.
I don’t know about everyone else, but I was always taught at school that gossiping was bad, and seen as anti-feminist to be talking behind other girls’ backs. Yet throughout history, gossip has been used to protect women, sharing valuable information in safe environments whilst boosting female friendships. More and more research is being done, uncovering the power behind gossip, dating back to the Middle Ages. It is estimated around two-thirds of our conversations focus on personal matters. Gossip is a powerful tool for spreading information- whether it is accurate or not. It can make or break reputations and friendships, but can also solidify relationships and support communication. So, is gossip as destructive as it seems?
Oral history is a difficult one to obtain, with words being lost in history without ever being recorded. However, gossip has not always had negative connotations like it does now. The etymology of the word gossip comes from ‘godsibb’ meaning- a friend or relative in God, a person with whom one converses, usually in relation to baptism. Although it is surprising to see gossip come from religious connections, it is fitting considering that in early societies groups were formed around religion, coming together to worship, in which groups could converse more freely together.
Sociolinguistic and famous feminist academic Deborah Tannen explores female social interactions and friendships in her work. It seems from being children, girls spend more time talking than their male counterparts, using secrets specifically to solidify their friendships. Tannen argues that gossip is beneficial to female friendships. She argues that for women ‘sharing personal information is like a first step towards friendship’. Gossip and information appear to be used as a tool by women. It is used to depict closeness between groups and display to others the closeness to their friends.
Tannen acknowledges the negative connotations surrounding gossip saying this stereotyping of gossip also ‘gives women a bad rep’. However, she believes that gossip is not necessarily talking behind others’ backs. Instead, it can be talking about others’ lives, and not necessarily in a negative light. Instead, it appears it is simply a discussion. She argues that being interested in a friend’s personal life creates closeness between them. She also explores the negative sides of gossip, where conversations turn sour. She argues there must be a balance of wanting to ‘share secrets in order to form friendships and to think through problems with the need’.Female friendships are so vital in my life, and I am sure they are in yours too. There is something special about a close platonic bond with another woman that cannot be recreated. I think the conversational and understanding element is so important. So I do understand the importance of gossip. Being able to talk freely about a multitude of topics, usually personal, does bring people closer. I also completely appreciate the negative reputation gossip has. I am sure we have all fallen victim to others talking behind our backs, feeling hurt and embarrassed that others would discuss our personal lives so freely and seemingly without care. Yet, I am also confident we have all probably gossiped with friends, not intending to cause any harm, instead just communicating and discussing information. Female friendships are something to be appreciated, and as Tannen emphasised, gossip can be a way to nourish these friendships, but it needs to be handled with care and appreciation.