When I think about dating, my mind goes first to flowers. I think of walks on a boardwalk and little carnivals and sometimes even cute polaroids. There’s something implicitly romantic about all those things—possibly because of the frequency and way in which they are represented in movies and social media posts. Before college, my brain could never fathom a date in a dining hall. Yet, two of the more popular places in South Bend for Notre Dame students are the North and South Dining Halls.
This analysis of a dining hall date, or “DHD,” is prompted by my friend’s most recent story. She asked a boy that she was crushing on to go to lunch since they both love the quesadillas at North. He obliged, and eventually they had a great lunch filled with good conversation and even better food. She told our friends about the DHD later that day, and we were all so excited about the prospect of a second date for the two of them.
While inside the Notre Dame Bubble here in South Bend, this aspect of “Notre Dating” is a huge step in the right direction. It may even lead to studying together in the library, walking around the lakes holding hands and discussing the concept of a ring before spring (but probably not). However, outside of the Bubble, this occurrence seems out of place. The date is oddly public, as your friends can spy on you (since you all go to dinner at 5 o’clock to beat the lines). The building is sometimes loud, either with the 6 o’clock rush or with the clapping that follows after some poor soul drops a cup or plate. Most importantly, the menu options and their quality range significantly from day to day (aka me getting excited about the macaroni and cheese only to see that it’s the build your own). Despite this, many relationships start with DHDs because of their casual nature. The expectations are low, there’s no dress code to worry about and the awkwardness of having little to talk about can be fixed with people-watching.
At other schools, dining hall dates occur much less frequently. This may be due to the quality of their dining halls and the availability of other eateries. The dining halls of other schools appear often on their college’s Barstool accounts. College students in urban places end up eating at local restaurants, whether it’s ramen places in Boston or healthy-living pop-ups in New York.
Yet, at Notre Dame, a dining hall date seems to be a rite of passage in a relationship. Can you eat at South with that boy from your small seminar class? Will the boy that you gain the courage to talk to be unable to hold a conversation in North? Will your date point out that your food is all the same color? Perhaps. However, all of the questions can only be answered after the leap of faith that is a date at the dining hall.
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