Remember when you first left for college and had to say goodbye to your dog? Well now imagine that your dog has experienced nearly every memory with you for the past 18 years and shares your genetics. Also, imagine your dog is a human.
Now you know in a convoluted way what it’s like to leave your twin for college. You’ve seen them at their worst and their best, and now you can’t wrap your mind around the fact that you’re about to not see them at all for a few months.
After dropping my twin brother off at a school in Virginia just a day before I moved into Notre Dame, I reflected on what it meant to be a twin. After meeting other twins here that shared the same feelings, I put together a list of truths that long-distance-siblings can relate to.
TRUTH #1: You are no longer “one of the _______ twins”.
While being referred to in the context of another person was annoying in high school, it became so familiar that you never realized its impact on you. You’re no longer the “funny twin” or the “studious one” or “your parents’ favorite” (sorry, John). While you love your twin, you feel as if you’re finally able to forge your own identity, and it’s both liberating and a little bit scary.
TRUTH #2: Your inside jokes will go unnoticed.
You know that one time the person said that one thing? And so then you turned around to laugh about it with your twin because it resembled something hilarious that your uncle did on a family vacation. But then you realize that they’re not there, and sometimes you have to just laugh to yourself and make a mental note to tell them all about what happened to remind you of that.
TRUTH #3: You feel guilty for not making enough time to talk to them.
College is complicated, things come up, FOMO happens and suddenly you’re putting off your facetime date yet again. You’re paranoid that they might feel neglected, but you feel guilty mainly because miss them terribly and just want to know what’s happening in their life.
TRUTH #4: You trash-talk each other’s schools when it’s game day.
Now I don’t have this problem because I go to Notre Dame, but I imagine it’s a struggle for my twin (who goes to an ACC school) to watch my school beat his and be clearly superior at every varsity sport. Go Irish.
TRUTH #5: Your best friends are strangers to them.
In high school, you knew who they were hanging out with and they knew the same about you, and often times your friends were their friends. But now you’re meeting their friends over facetime, and you often say your hallmate’s name in a story and remember that you have to clarify who they are. You want to be able to connect your two worlds, but you’re not sure how because you’ve never really faced this problem before.
TRUTH #6: You feel incomplete in some inexplicable way.
The feeling I’m talking about is similar to that of having a small pit in your stomach when you know you’re forgetting something. It often hits when you’re sitting in your dorm room alone or watching one of their favorite Netflix shows, and you know it won’t go away until you find time to call each other and catch up.
TRUTH #7: You count down the days until you’re reunited.
After weeks of trying to bridge the gap between you and your twin, it’s finally time to see them again. Thankfully, because you two are so close, it feels like you only said goodbye yesterday and you’re able to pick up right where you left off.
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