Being a college student is exciting because we are provided with more opportunities than we have ever been exposed to in our lifetimes — new friends, new classes, new professors, new extracurriculars, new cities, and the list goes on. With this thrilling and expanding world, there are important things from life before college that continue on the journey with us, just in a different form, and some that stay behind: friends from home.
Whether you have one close friend from home or 10, it can be difficult to stay in touch with home friends. Personally, I have two very close friends from home. We are in different states and time zones and we have very different lives now, with our own busy schedules. While I wish I was able to talk to them more, we communicate often enough and ensure we stay up-to-date on one another’s lives — even with so much going on. Plus, I know that we are just one phone call, text, DM, or Snapchat away. How do we do it? (I say “we” because every relationship is a team effort.)
For starters, I love spontaneous or random phone calls. When I am on a walk somewhere, folding my laundry, or simply need a brain break from work, I am intentional about giving my friends a call and they do the same when they have a moment of free time. Most of the time we miss each other because of the nature of our schedules, but sometimes we can connect. When we are unable to connect, it will spark a scheduled phone call.
If something important is happening in our lives or we quickly want some advice, a simple text emphasizing the urgency helps put down homework, TV or whatever it may be to ensure we are there for one another when we need it. I remember walking to a date on the phone with my friend as she was giving me advice. Another time, I was walking back to my dorm late at night, and my friend stayed on the phone with me to make sure I got home safely. Another time, I had an important internship deadline and I called my friend to help me weigh the pros and cons of my decision. We know we will get around to the classic, lengthy catch-up at some point, but, in the meantime, we hop on the phone as soon as support is needed.
Another thing my friends from home and I like to do is send random text or audio messages about things happening in our lives, big and small. This is a great way to share life’s moments and it does not require a fast response. The response can come when there is a suitable time to reply. Sometimes even a message like “I’m thinking of you” or “I miss you” can go a long way.
Even though I do not talk to my friends from home every day, I take comfort in knowing that they will always be there for me when I need it. We have a long history and the friendships are so strong they can survive and thrive with distance.
This may not necessarily be the case with all home friends, which I also learned. Some friends will fall out of touch, and that is OK. There is a chance to reconnect down the road, but something else I take comfort in is holding on to the nice memories and knowing that the friendship was beneficial to me for a period of time in my life. I enjoyed spending time with that person, but now we are in different places and I accept that.