As someone who consumes a lot of romantic media in the form of books and rom-coms, I find myself constantly drawn to one specific trope time and time again: the enemies-to-lovers arc. This plotline will never fail to entertain me. Many would agree that the tension between the two characters and the electrifying climax when they realize they love each other remains unmatched.
However, why are we so captivated by this trope if it begins with two people who despise each other? Shouldn’t we typically want to avoid spending time with people we hate? Or, should we be more open to giving people second chances in real life? What if learning to love our enemies can teach us something valuable? Let’s dive into it!
I love this trope mainly because of the banter between two characters who can’t stand each other. The dialogue is witty, filled with tension and keeps me turning the pages. However, it also draws me in because there is something comforting about watching two people who perceive each other as different find commonalities and learn to love one another.
My favorite piece of media that features an enemies-to-lovers trope is the second season of “Bridgerton,” which is based on the book “The Viscount Who Loved Me” by Julia Quinn. I read the entirety of the book on a plane ride from Philadelphia to Scottsdale; I was enthralled by every page and couldn’t put it down. My favorite scenes included Anthony Bridgerton and Kate Sharma’s competitive face-off during a game of pall-mall and their heated argument when Anthony confesses that he can’t marry her sister because he’s in love with her.
What makes their story so beautiful is that, in their most raw forms, they are truly similar. It was sweet to watch two characters discover who they are together and conquer their fears with the help of one another.
I asked some of my friends how they felt about the trope, and here’s what they had to say. My roommate, Maria Killian, shared that she enjoys it because, in her opinion, “enemies-to-lovers is one of the only romance tropes where the characters see the worst in each other and still choose to love them.” Maria’s favorite enemies-to-lovers story is “Fourth Wing” by Rebbeca Yarros, and she highly recommends it to anyone who loves fantasy.
My second roommate, Ella Carlson, said that she is drawn to the trope because “there is a lot of drama. I love the tension when they start as enemies because they are attracted to each other and won’t admit it. The relationship is more gratifying at the end because of it.” Ella’s top choice for an enemies-to-lovers movie is “Ten Things I Hate About You.”
My sister, Abby Drozd, said, “What I love about it is the whole idea that people aren’t what they originally seem and that they have the capacity to change or grow. Because of this, to me, the ultimate enemies-to-lovers will always be ‘Pride and Prejudice’ because both characters need to put their initial misconceptions to the side and change for the better before they can be together. That’s also one of the things that I think a lot of modern enemies-to-lovers stories do wrong, they make the guy a complete ass who then is only nice toward the woman all of a sudden because he is attracted to her, and I’m not interested in those types of stories. A good enemies-to-lovers has both characters develop throughout the story.”
Many of us love this trope because, despite our flaws, we know that there is someone out there who will love us wholly for everything we are and aren’t. One day we can learn to love the people we believe we oppose, and that fact gives me a glimmer of optimism in this world. There are parts of ourselves that we believe make us hard to love, but in reality, with the right person, that is not the case. We all have room to grow, and growing alongside someone makes the process even more meaningful. I will always revisit the enemies-to-lovers trope because of everything we can learn from it. Plus the witty banter, of course.