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How to Deal With Rejection

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Northeastern chapter.

Picture this: You meet a guy at orientation and you think he’s cute.

At the start of school, you reconnect with this guy and start hanging out. One month in, you find yourself in a predicament: you have a crush on this guy but you don’t know if he likes you back.

The signs point towards him liking you back – he’s eager to hang out with you, he buys you pastries and he stays up until 1am studying with you. This guy, however, is unwilling to make the first move. So, after much anticipation, you muster up the courage to tell him you like him. Anxiously, you walk up to his room and knock on the door. You start up a casual conversation and then you get down to business. You tell him you have feelings for him and wait for his response… And then he friend-zones you.

Not going to lie, rejection is hard. At first you might pretend you’re okay with the outcome of the situation, but after a few minutes, the rejection sinks in, and you start spiraling. Next comes telling all of your friends about what happened. You bounce your problems off of as many people as possible, searching for an answer as to why you were rejected.

The next few days will take you on an emotional roller coaster. You might wake up the next morning in a bit of a haze. One hour you’re depressed and the next you’re flying high as a kite. Try not to make any rash decisions while you’re on an upswing. It’s possible that while you’re recovering from the rejection, you might go on a rampage and spend hundreds of dollars, at least if you’re anything like me, that is.It might take a week or so before you feel like your normal self. Being rejected makes you feel like you’re not worthy, and you definitely might feel embarrassed that you put your emotions on the line and they weren’t reciprocated.

Don’t worry. It may be awkward between you and your crush for a few days or even a few weeks, but over time, especially if you were friends, things will go back to normal.

After all, college is about taking risks and trying new things, and if this guy or girl doesn’t happen to be the right match, don’t worry about it. Try your best not to cut this person out of your life completely. If he or she is a good person, they won’t think much of the situation, and they should be willing to continue on as friends.

Rejection is difficult, especially when you’ve taken the chance to be vulnerable, but it happens to the best of us. Very few people go through life without experiencing rejection. And in the long run, you took the risk and put yourself out there. If you didn’t try, you wouldn’t have a clear answer, which can be equally as tormenting as rejection (or more). Don’t be afraid to put yourself out there again. You’re a badass and you deserve someone who wants you as much as you want them.

Ilana Hirschfeld

Northeastern '22

Ilana Hirschfeld is a first-year student at Northeastern University, majoring in Environmental Studies and Political Studies. Originally from San Diego, California, she's excited to be starting a new chapter of her life in Boston!
Xandie Kuenning is the Career Editor at Her Campus and a graduate of Northeastern University with a Bachelor's in International Affairs and minors in Journalism and Psychology. She is an avid traveler with a goal to join the Travelers' Century Club. When not gallivanting around the world, she can be found reading about fairytales or Eurasian politics, baking up a storm, or watching dangerous amounts of Netflix. Follow her on Instagram @AKing1917 and on Twitter @XKuenning.