Recently, TikTok user Claire McDonnell, or @cleasel, went viral for recording her STEM class, where she was constantly interrupted, spoken over, and, when she was finally able to get a word in, discounted. This video resonated with hundreds of female STEM majors across the world, all with their own stories of being talked over, ignored, or demeaned in male-dominated fields.
The STEM field isn’t the only place where women are excluded or doubted, either. Go to any social media post by ESPN about an exceptional female athlete or women’s sports, and the comments are filled with men talking about how it’s not a “real sport” or how she should “get back in the kitchen.”
We live in a male-dominated society. There’s no questioning that. From sexist comments from random men on the internet to institutional problems such as the wage gap, there’s no denying that our culture needs to change. But what can we do as individuals while we wait for such change to happen?
A lot of people will tell us that the answer is simple. Change your tone of voice, change your hair, change your facial expressions. Basically, act more like men, and you’ll succeed in a male-dominated world. But not only is this way of thinking contradictory, since, if we do that, we’re labeled as “nasty” or “emotional”, but it is also harmful. By telling us that the only way to succeed in life is to act like a man reinforces the idea that feminine equals weak or lesser than. Confidence and strength aren’t just masculine qualities.
People also like to say that true change comes from within, and that the only thing we really have control over is ourselves. While this is true, and while self-confidence can go a long way, there’s also something to be said about the power that comes from women banding together in the face of adversity. Whether that comes in the form of advocating for female coworkers in the workplace, or standing up to online trolls, we can actively fight against a society that was built against us. As women rise to positions of power to enact actual change, we can support them. We have to have confidence in one another, and lift each other up.
While our society still has a long way to go in terms of truly leveling the playing field, it can be accelerated by us taking a stand and asserting that we do belong. We belong in engineering classes, we belong on the field, and we belong in this world.