To My Four-Legged Best Friend

Dear Four-Legged Best Friend,

I first met you on August 2017. I still remember the day I first saw your adorable tiny face and your paws, they were so fluffy they looked like cat’s paws. I tried to greet you but you were scared of me, you didn't know who I was, you didn't know if I was going to help you or going to hurt you; you decided to run away from me but I ran after you and hugged you for the very first time. You were afraid of everything because everything was new for you and you had changed homes so many times, you didn't understand what was going on. I knew from this moment that you were going to change my life forever.

I placed you in the brand new cage that I had just bought in Walmart, along with a small water dispenser and the cutest dog bowl that could ever exist. I took your cage, opened the car door and before we both knew it we were on our way home. You arrived, once again skeptical of what you were going to find, but as soon as I took you out of your tiny cage you jumped and explored your new backyard. You loved it! I was relieved that you were comfortable and liked your new home. I jumped the fence and started taking pictures of you like crazy, I didn't know why. I’m not a person who likes to take tons of pictures but for some reason I just felt the need to do so. Later on, I knew why.

You spent your first night in your new home, I couldn't sleep a bit that night, I would constantly wake up and check on you through my window. You were staring at the sky, wondering where you were. I woke up, placed food for the very first time in your bowl , changed your water and took you for a walk. You ran and smelled every single tree in the park, and after a while you had your favorite trees. We went back home and I gave you a treat, you were so happy and so was I.

Days passed and we got used to each other, you got used to my school schedule and I got used to your 6am bark telling me to wake up and take you for a walk, I got used to you jumping to catch my attention and rub your belly, I got used at the way in which you would prefer to drink water out of recycled gallon water bottles than your dispenser, I got used to seeing you laying down on your favorite spot, but most of all I got used to your company and your greeting every time I came back home.

September came and it was a hard time for me and my parents, you could feel this I know. You were there during this time cheering me up every time I saw you, you knew when to do small things to bring out a smile on me and you also knew when to stay quiet and sitting down, just giving me comfort with your company. Thank you for your company during this time, because thanks to you it was 10x easier to go through it.

October came and that’s where things started to go wrong. We could no longer stay at the place where I was living and had to look for a new home. At this time I still wasn't worried, I had faith that we’d find a good house, a house that allowed pets and sticked to the budget, a house that had a nice backyard for you because I knew you didn't like to be indoors.

November came and we still couldn't find a house, again I still wasn't worried, but I should have been. We started packing and I was busy at school, and I’m so sorry I couldn't spend as much time with you as I would have liked. I’m sorry I didn't take you on as many walks as before. I’m so sorry little buddy.

December came and I went home for the holidays but not a single day passed in which I would not think of you. As much as I enjoy being home I couldn't wait to come back so that I could pet your and play with you again. During December we found a house, but unfortunately it was a house with no backyard.

January came and I came back. When I got off the plane I couldn't wait to see you again! I couldn't wait to see your cute face, your fluffy paws and your wiggly tail. As soon as I walked through the door you greeted me eagerly and started jumping so that I would rub your belly. After I saw you I left and saw the new house for the very first time and I knew you were not going to be happy in this place. I knew you wouldn't like to be indoors and I knew that even if we build a small fence you still wouldn't have had enough space to run as you liked and your tiny paws would get hurt with the rocks. I knew that this place would make you sad.

I was torn, I didn't know what to do. I wanted you with me because you are the sweetest dog ever and the best boy in town, but I didn't want you to be sad and unhappy. I didn't want you to be in a small yard, I didn't want your small paws to get hurt, I wanted you to be happy because you deserve that and so much more.

Finally, a decision was made and I had to give you up for adoption.  I was heartbroken and destroyed on the inside, my heart ached so bad but I knew this was the best option for you, I knew that I had to do this. I can just say please forgive me, I just wanted what was best for you.

I finally had understood why I had taken so many pictures of you in such a short time and why you were going to change my life forever. You were never meant to stay in one home... maybe your mission is to go and cheer up different families when they need it the most. Maybe you weren’t born to have a forever home, and if you were I know that it was not with me.

So, my dear four-legged best friend, thank you so much for coming into my life in a time when I needed you the most. Thank you for being the best dog anyone could ask for. Thank you for greeting me every time I came home. Thank you so much Benji, and I really hope that you can forgive me for making such a hard decision, a decision that will scar my heart forever . I will always have a place in my heart for you and will miss your dearly, but I will remember you with a smile on my face every single day of my life and will pray for you every moment I can. Good luck Benji!

 Love you truly and will forever miss you.