I never imagined I would be the kind of college girl who would date someone who had recently graduated college. I had seen other girls attempt it and talk about how hard it is and could never envision that with my type of collegiette lifestyle. I’m already busy and don’t have much time, but surprisingly, I’m dating someone who understands more than any other guy I’ve dated about time, honesty, and keeping an open line of communication.
As it turns out, I judged guys who were living a post grad life too hard. I gave them far more maturity than even they would want to own up too.
But make no mistake— it’s a nice change that someone doesn’t talk about every party they’re going to. It’s nice to see the interests and passions that make someone come alive and talk about all their hopes and dreams. It’s nice to be on a date and not have to focus on messing around afterwards or what party you’re planning to go to as a couple that weekend. It’s nice to be courted, which I did not know previous to dating my post grad guy.
It can be hard too sometimes. His priority is obviously work, bills, and finding his footing in a new phase of life. The time you get to spend together during the week must be extremely planned. He’s not sleeping over if he has to be up and out the door early, and to be honest, would you really want him leaving your place or dorm room because he has to go to work? I would feel like I’m dragging him back into the college world, while he’s trying to transition and make something of himself. There is a certain finesse you learn to master about incorporating him into your college life without feeling like you’re dragging him somewhere where he may feel awkward. It’s important to remember that it becomes harder to make meaningful connections after you’ve walked across that stage. Which is why it means more when you find someone who is confident enough in themselves to say “We’ll make it work.”
I was lucky enough to find someone who doesn’t mind dealing with the college scene every now and then and, frankly, probably participates in a night out way better than me.
When you’re not exactly planning out every single date out, you’ll find yourself communicating often because getting together might be extremely hard to do.
And God forbid you make an attempt to snatch the check after dinner. I would go into a date feeling confident I would pick up the tab before him and so far I have never been successful. Never. It’s almost becoming this unspoken competition within myself. If anyone has tips, then please send them my way.
My post grad guy is a dream. I can’t promise they’re all like that, but it’s always worth a shot to broaden your horizons.