If I’m being honest, I was really hesitant about how this semester was going to go. As a senior here at NC State, the last time I had in-person classes was in the Spring of 2020 right before spring break. I remember it so clearly. I was eating dinner at a restaurant in Carolina Beach with 3 of my friends on our spring break trip. We were watching the news blow up about how Duke had just sent all their students home due to rising COVID concerns. We were laughing and joking about how NC State would be next. No one was wearing masks in the restaurant, there were no signs plastered everywhere about staying 6 ft apart or making sure to wash your hands. Yet, weeks later, those things would soon become the norm. It is so weird to reflect back on that time in my life. I had formed so many good relationships with women in my sorority and outside of it as well. I had my main two friend groups that I had spent all of freshman year trying to form that I did everything with. I was doing well in all my classes and had just asked a cute boy I liked to be my date to my sorority formal (which was 2 weeks after spring break), and he had said YES. I was thriving. And more importantly, I was so incredibly happy. I found my people and my place at NC State. I no longer wanted to go home every weekend or felt the need to call my mom every other day. I also no longer thought about transferring schools, which was a frequent thought freshman year when I wasn’t very happy with my life here.
Things immediately changed after we were sent home. At first, I was excited to get a longer spring break. Professors were extending deadlines for assignments and tests were being moved. I was having a fun time relaxing on the beach with my best friends. I didn’t know anyone who was sick and I wasn’t scared yet. After our Airbnb rental time elapsed, we had to all go back home, as NC State would not allow us back in our sorority house, which, by the way, had all of my notebooks and clothes (with the exception of my bathing suits and computer). I wasn’t too concerned, as I imagined I would be able to go back and get them soon. About a month later, I was finally allowed back into my sorority house and was forced to move out all of my belongings in total isolation. We each had to schedule a time to move out and they could not be at the same time as anyone else, to ensure our safety, and limit the risk of transmission. I was extremely sad. There would be no more in-house memories to be made and I never got to say goodbye to my friends that weren’t on that spring break trip with me. It was a very difficult time. I struggled to cope for a while, managed to visit some of my more distant family during the summer, but dealt with a fully remote junior year of college. Luckily by then, I was somewhat adjusted to Zoom classes, online exams, and not seeing anyone in person due to half of my sophomore year being remote. But that didn’t make it any easier mentally. I struggled to stay positive, rarely left my room or saw my friends, and was feeling very lonely. My summer dreams of studying abroad in Europe came and went (I was accepted into a Summer 2020 Poland program that got cancelled) and I was not feeling very happy with my life. I went home a lot and got to go on some great family vacations to the beach and an isolated cabin in upstate New York, while also trying to stay safe. Those moments with my family and my dog were my saving grace of last year and frankly the only thing that got me through my depression.
Flash forward to a year later, now August 2021, to when I am fully vaccinated and NC State is preparing to go back to in-person classes. I am filled with a rush of emotions. Anxiety and nervousness over potentially getting sick and spreading COVID to others. Excitement to finally see people in person and be welcomed back into my sorority house as an out of house member. My first day of class felt like freshman year all over again. I left my apartment very early so I would have enough time to park and walk to class. I hadn’t been to campus in a year and a half and I had even forgotten all my favorite shortcuts to class. I arrived 20 minutes early to class and just ended up sitting outside the building for a while so I could keep my mask off. It was an extremely weird feeling to be back in a classroom with people surrounding me. I befriended my neighbors, all of whom were juniors and seniors in microbiology (like me) and we bonded over our shared experiences and feelings about being in person again. I adjusted relatively quickly to the in-person format. It is much harder than online, in my opinion, because I have a lot of long labs and I am constantly held accountable for work and due dates. I started hanging out with my friends every day and grabbing meals at my sorority house for the first time in a while. I was finally starting to feel normal again, with the exception of having to wear masks in class.
Things were going great up until last Monday, when I woke up coughing with congestion and a 100.2 fever in the middle of the night. I immediately thought I must have COVID, despite the fact that I received a negative test 4 days prior. I have been diagnosed with cold-induced asthma and have struggled seasonally since I was a baby. This flare up felt like my past flare-ups but worse, so I went to urgent care. The second I got there and stated my symptoms, the nurse put on a full hazmat suit and was convinced I had Delta. She tested me and sent me on my way. Obviously I could not go to class with a 100.2 fever and a pending Covid test result, so I emailed all of my professors to let them know. Some were nicer than others, and one even let me take an in-person test I had missed on Moodle 2 days late, which I was very grateful for. Once I received my negative test result, however, and informed my professors, my lab professor expected me to come to class on Thursday. I stated that I could not, as I had not been fever-free for 24 hours and was still hacking up a lung constantly. He told me there was “no making up missed lab work” and that I would be behind for the rest of the semester, which immediately stressed me out. This was in addition to the stress of being sick, missing the entire 4th week of class, being behind in my other classes, and also feeling afraid that I had given whatever I had to my friends and classmates. I had a virtual visit with my home primary care doctor on Friday and she knew it was my asthma and prescribed me a steroid and antibiotics. Now, almost a week later, I am still not 100%, but have to attend my classes and attempt to breathe through my double masks and face shield in lab. It is a struggle to say the least, but I am very thankful that I do not have COVID. I am very thankful to be back in person and have a semi-normal last year of college, but I did not expect to be plagued with a non-COVID illness and be out for a week. My roommates and I are very COVID-cautious and get tested every week, in addition to taking all of our herbal supplements and EMERGEN-C immune supplement drinks. This COVID scare really terrified me, but I know that as long as I continue to take good care of myself and stay safe, I should be okay for the rest of the year and hopefully have an in-person graduation in the spring.