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This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Mt Holyoke chapter.

Okay, I’m late. Bisexuality Day, also known as Bi Visibility Day, was on September 23rd. But do you ever need an excuse to celebrate being bi? I don’t think so. (I prefer to use “bi” in this article since I want to include biromantic asexuals as well, being one of them.) Here’s a little about what it’s been like to be bi for me, and how proud of it I’ve come to be.

The first time I came to identify as bi, I was thirteen. (Yeah, there was a first time. Not all bi people are confused, but thirteen-year-old me definitely was!) I liked a boy who was two and a half years older than me, lived across the country, and barely knew I existed. I confronted him when he insulted my best friend, then stopped talking to him for three years, during which I realized I really, really liked girls, changed the orientation I identified with several times (from aromantic, to lesbian, to bi again), came out to more people than I can remember in ways ranging from serious sit-down conversations to accidentally telling them I like girls because I couldn’t miss an opportunity to make a pun about it.

I currently have a loving boyfriend who respects my orientation for what it is. He and I both thought I was a lesbian the first time we met, so there’s that for meet-cute stories. I felt pretty bad when I changed my mind, because I didn’t want to fit into the stereotype of the confused bi person who just needs to “choose a side.” I was also really tired of never being able to figure out my sexuality—I hadn’t stuck to a single label for more than two years since I was eleven—but I started to make my peace with it.

And I’m not here to tell the bi people reading this that they have to choose a side, or stick to anything, or be confused. If you’re figuring things out, that’s fine. If you’re totally confident in your orientation, that’s fine, too. If you’re managing a balance of both, that’s also fine. Know that you’re far from alone, and don’t be scared to be visible!

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Caroline Mao

Mt Holyoke '22

She/her or they/them, class of 2022, Mount Holyoke prospective studio art and computer science major who enjoys reading and petting dogs.
Mount Holyoke College is a gender-inclusive, historically women's college in South Hadley, MA.