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The Do’s and Don’ts of First Date Etiquette!

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Montclair chapter.
Summer is fast approaching us and that means you’ll come across some hot flings. We want to make it our duty that they start off hot and stay that way! So, here are some of my do’s and don’ts for a first date.



 

  • The Location. If you’re in charge of choosing, choose a place where you can talk and get to know him/her. A great place would be a restaurant. However, don’t choose a pricey restaurant! We don’t want to take advantage of our date’s wallet. Also, if you’re going to a restaurant, make sure it’s one that has a lot of variety on the menu. On the other hand, it’s summer, ladies! Take advantage of the outdoors. Try going to a carnival/festival, do a picnic in the park, or do some sightseeing. A bad and cliché example for a first date would be the movies. You can’t talk to one another while watching a movie. You can barely see each other’s faces. At the end of the date, you’ll know nothing about each other and that’s not a good thing. Leave the movie date for next time.
  • Getting There. It’s always been said that a gentleman should pick up a lady for their date, or the person who asked the other out. However, as time has passed, I’ve come to the realization that meeting up somewhere isn’t a bad idea. Let’s face it; we don’t really know much about the person we’re going out on a date with. Therefore, it would be a much safer idea to take separate cars. However, if you’re okay with your date picking you up, make sure they walk up to your front door instead of just beeping the horn for you to come outside. If you have a roommate, leave them a note with the address of the place you’re going to, just in case anything was to happen. Safety comes first!
  • Your Appearance. Your appearance will depend on the venue. If you’re going to restaurant, go with a fresh and girly look! A cute, delicate dress (floral pattern, solid colors, etc.) and heels (not too high) would make your date see the fun and lighthearted side of you. You can also sport a pair of skinny jeans and cute top with heels. Also, you can opt to wear flats with any of these outfits if it’s a more casual date. Do not wear all black, make sure your heels are not too high, and your dress isn’t too short. As for hair, you can wear it up or down, curly or straight. Whatever floats your boat! You just want to look natural. Speaking of natural, please wear light makeup! Some eyeliner, mascara, blush, and a lipstick (no lip gloss!) will do. Remember you’re there to impress your date, not the other people around you.
  • Making Conversation. Before starting the conversation, make sure your posture is in check. Sit up straight and don’t lean your elbows on the table. As far as the conversation goes, keep it light. Ask questions and listen, discuss each other’s interests, just simply get to know each other first. 
  1. Do not talk about yourself too much. The last thing you want is to seem self-centered. 
  2. Stay away from topics like politics, religion, money, past relationships, and the economy. Topics like these are definitely buzz killers. 
  3. Do not ask about long-term plans. You two just met. Let this date be carefree and fun! It’s not an inquisition!
  • Ordering and Eating. When the time comes to order, choose wisely. Don’t get anything that requires the use of your hands. No sandwiches, burgers, no finger food like ribs, and most importantly no spaghetti. Can you imagine the mess that will be? Also, stay away from garlic and onions. Bad breath is not an option! When you eat, take your time. Don’t inhale your food. You don’t want to seem like you haven’t eaten in ages.
  • The Bill. There are people who strongly believe the man should always pay for the bill because it shows that he has good morals and respects his duties as a man. When the bill comes, it could get a little awkward. Therefore, scramble for your wallet in your purse to make it seem like you’re willing to pay, and most likely, your date will tell you not to worry and that he’s taking care of it. If not, come with enough money for you both to split the bill and leave a tip. A great amount to go with is $40. We are all college students on a tight budget, so it’s understandable to split it in half!
  • The End. Dates usually go either way, and by that I mean really good or really bad. Either you connected with the person or you simply didn’t have any chemistry. If the date went well, then a hug, some small talk, and even a simple kiss on the lips will do. The kiss implies that you’d like to see them again. Don’t forget your manners and thank them! Great ways to show your appreciation is to text them afterwards and remind them how much you enjoyed yourself, and to bring up something you both talked about during the date. However, don’t make it awkward by asking to go out again. Leave that one up to them. If the date didn’t go well, give them a kiss on the cheek and thank them for dinner, and say that you both will talk soon. A great tip would be to take your keys out of your bag a few blocks before your house because it implies that you’re not up for small talk.

Good luck, collegiettes! I hope these simple do’s and don’ts will help you out with your first date jitters and turn them into butterflies! Remember, be yourself! 

I'm an eternal optimist, aspiring PR girl, fashionsta and friend. I love my position at Her Campus Montclair. Being Editor-in-Chief has taught me how to manage time, be creative with content, and most of all, how to be an effective leader. I'm currently the social media manager at the New Yorker Hotel and Manhattan Center in NYC. When I was the social media director for HC Montclair, I learned just how incredible being connected with the world could be for any business. Social media has become a part of almost everyone's life. I adore it for all it can do and hope to one day own a social media consulting firm that can go into struggling businesses or start up businesses and help them out.