It had been a pretty busy day for me. I had a stats test that evening, so my social media game was a bit lacking this past 4/20, and I hadn’t really heard of the challenge until after my night exam when I went over to my friend’s room to celebrate the holiday: his 19th birthday with store-bought cake.
And then it happened.
“Oh my gosh, guys, look at this girl’s lips!”
“Holy shit, these people are so stupid!”
“Someone’s gotta do it…”
As all the eyes in the room turned toward me as I shoved the HyVee yellow cake into my mouth. I looked up and realized my duty. Being the only one brave (foolish) enough to try, my friend emptied his vitamin bottle and handed it to me.
I looked at the bottle in my hand, looked at my friends and said, “So what do I do?”
They instructed me how the challenge worked and I went for it. Sticking my lips in the little tube, I started sucking in the air. It was similar to when you just finished working your ass off at the gym and start chugging your bottle of Gatorade. Your lips get stuck in it, and you have to awkwardly pull your lips out. And, of course, you make eye contact with someone while you do it, or is that just my luck?
Anyway, after doing it for a little over a minute, my lips started to really hurt! It felt like I had a clip on them, and I just had to stop.
The looks on my friends’ faces should’ve been enough to make me stop.
The pictures they showed me should’ve been enough to make me stop.
Should’ve.
Should’ve, but didn’t.
Everyone has this friend. The really quiet sweetheart who you’d do absolutely anything for, although they’d never even dream of asking you for anything. This friend for me was David. David comes over after the initial hoopla of my first attempt at the challenge and hands me a mason jar.
“You should try doing it with this,” he says to me in his whisper of a voice. It’s what I imagine an angel sounds like. Let me also tell you that David will be spending his summer in Spain as a nanny and has even decided to be an RA next year. Don’t even try to tell me you could say no to a man this great.
I grab the Mason jar and start the challenge once again. Because the edges were smoother, I didn’t have that pinching feeling again. This was also bad because I really had nothing that made me feel like I had to stop with the challenge. I eventually pulled the jar off after my friends were screaming at me how bad an idea this was, how horrible my lips were gonna look, and that I was going to be beyond pissed when I saw what happened. Their reactions were scary. The pictures were worse.
All in all, I would 10/10 NOT recommend the #KylieJennerLipChallenge.