Freeze! Slowly put down the chocolate. Her Campus Mizzou knows a breakup can leave you feeling like a prisoner to your own bed, head and heart. As one of the most recent victims of a romantic hit-and-run, I can sympathize with those of you who need to listen to Usher’s “Let it Burn” for hours on end and who have a breakdown because even the rolled-up gum wrapper in your pocket reminds you of him. But eventually we all have to move on. There’s no time like the present to leave Usher and the waterworks behind and begin life as the new, single you.
Blow up your best friend’s phone.
You need to talk to someone about what you’re feeling. This is what all those years of friendship have prepared your BFF for. This is the big leagues, and she is up to bat. Talking ebbs the feeling of loneliness. “It reminds you that you’re not alone,” writes Kevin Kurgansky, author of The Ultimate Guide On How to Get Over a Break Up. “And even more importantly, it reminds you that there are people in your life that care about you.” Having a vent session with someone you are close to helps prevent that not-so-dignified drunk text sent to your ex.
Jog it off.
Rather than hitting the Cheetos (and hitting them hard), exercise. Working toward a healthier lifestyle is a more effective post-breakup activity. Not only does it help reduce stress, but it also releases endorphins and acts like a free dose of happiness. “It totally changes your mood,” Kurgansky says. “It’s like hitting a reset button and can definitely help you take your mind off your ex.” Exercising is a quick fix to help you feel sexy and confident again after a disheartening separation.
Get passionate.
It’s easy to lose interest in a hobby when you devote all of your energy to a relationship. Rekindle that old flame with something you were once really passionate about. Volunteering is a fantastic pastime for the newly single. Giving back will allow you to improve yourself as you improve the lives of others. “Do something kind for other people,” writes Gary Neuman, author of Emotional Infidelity. “Remember as difficult as this time might be, your life is still valuable. There’s a lot of important work to do and a lot of people who you can help.” Charity will help you understand that even though your relationship fell through, you still have a lot to be thankful for.
Make some space.
Now the hard part – distance. Although sending him an “I miss you” text might make you feel hopeful at the time, communication between you and your ex just delays the process of recovery. “Distance is important,” says freshman Rebecca Gale. “You need time to get over a person before you start talking to them again, so you can get rid of any hard feelings.” Even if your ex was your best friend, you must rely on your other friends at this time. Allowing each other the time and space to recover from the blow of the breakup will give you the best chance at sustaining a healthy friendship later on.