Dear boy bands around the world,
This letter must be written, because as much as I hate to admit it, my roommate and I now start every weekday by listening to “What Makes You Beautiful” by one of you boy bands mentioned in this letter. I tried to fight it when I heard five of you adorable Irish and British boys were talking about how you love your girlfriends on the radio, only to realize it was One Direction, but your lyrics hit me like I was 12 again and singing in my room to Justin Timberlake when he had a blonde fro. I don’t know what is going on in the world, but you boy bands are taking over. Maybe the end of the world process is underway. First sign was Bieber Fever, now it’s return of the boy band. I thought I was over this phase in my life, I obsessed over the Backstreet Boys until well into my late teens, but no you come out with these songs that make us wish you actually were fully matured and available. So here are five major points as to why this boy band frenzy may be the best, yet worst thing to happen since Hannah Montana decided to grow up and just be Miley.
We Can’t Fight It
I think the first time I heard One Direction’s “What Makes You Beautiful” I said, “Barf” and wondered why the Disney Channel had to continuously make their television stars singers. Then I caught the end one day where I think Harry, sings, “You light up my world like nobody else,” by himself all adorbs and slightly sexy, and you had me. I could not fight my distain and pride any longer. You made me feel beautiful as I rocked out in my SUV, getting ready for class, and whilst out on the town. I don’t know where you get this power. Maybe it’s your precious manly British and Irish accents? Maybe it’s your stylish clothes and flippy hair? I don’t know, but I’ve fallen victim to this boy band power.
How Thoughtful
“You cast a spell on me, hit me like the sky fell on me.” There’s a statement a lady wants to hear. Nice work, The Wanted. Your boy band frenemie (I’d imagine boy bands have frenemies, being there are five of you and you’re all wearing skinny jeans) One Direction takes it one step further with, “You’ll understand why I want you so desperately, right now I’m looking at you and I can’t believe, you don’t know you’re beautiful.” Wow, I can’t even deal with how nice that is. What guys says that to a girl, and means it? It seems as though hearing the usual, “Haha well you’re hot lol,” or the classic, “Hey sexy ;)” in text or Facebook chat form really doesn’t scream thoughtful. Boy bands of the word, I love you for your thoughtfulness, while at the same time cringing at this level of corniness.
Teach American Boys a Lesson
So it would be real nice if you could somehow use that power and charm of yours to win over the American boys. Notice I don’t say men. Seriously I feel as though if Yankee boys listened to your songs, a lot more American girls would not curse them as much. Granted this is a bit of stretch, because I’m pretty certain American boys from age 18-22 are using the line from 40 Year Old Virgin while playing Call of Duty with each other, “You know how I know you’re gay? You listen to One Direction to and from work.” Sorry boy banders, I regret to inform you this is probably a true statement, but don’t worry these boys don’t have number one songs or the love of millions of girls. However the Biebs may have something on you, he has moves and has smooth lyrics like “If I was your boyfriend, I’d never let you go.” Watch that one. Continue telling us we’re beautiful and to whip our hair back and forth like it’s no body’s business.
Umm How Old Are You?
So as I stated above, you’ve probably heard of Justin Bievber. Well, until recently I had to keep my love for him under wraps due to his age and my well being. Now he’s 18 and everything’s fine and it’s acceptable to listen to “Boyfriend” and “One Time” repeatedly. When I began rocking out to your lovely songs however and finely had to investigate the wicked amount of pins of you boys on Pinterest, I knew I need to Wikipedia some biographies. Despite my initial worry with your innocent smiles and nice lyrics all of you are 18 and older. I really just need to stop writing whatever I’m thinking. But cheers to you all being legal!
Solo, Yolo
Now let me just let you know, coming from a girl who used to write letters professing my love to the Backstreet Boys or asking N*SYNC if they needed a new opening act, you will have drama. There is always going to be that one that takes the front man position, the one that everyone loves the most. You may all slightly look and sound the same now, because you’re just starting out and love being in a group; you’re a boy band not a group. But there will be a change in the tide at some point. My predictions are that that Harry fellow from One Direction will be the crowd favorite, and that scruffy manly one from The Wanted will do great things. I mean you may love your mates, but as Drake says you only live once, so break free favorite boy banders.
I realize this is embarrassing coming from a 22 year old American college student, but at least I can admit I have a problem. Apparently this problem is turning into an epidemic, because the radio waves are blowing up with your songs. I say go ahead with your bad boy band selves, and let those screaming girls treat you like The Beatles, because let’s be honest you will never be The Beatles. But I heart you and that is all that matters.
All my love for boy bands,
Kate Cramer
Photo Sources:
www.metro.co.uk
www.mirror.co.uk