Dear Brooke,
I could not fall asleep for hours on Tuesday night. I sobbed, I shook, I even vomited at one point. As I lay in bed, wanting so badly to slip into the blissful forgetfulness of sleep but unable to, I grieved for many things – for my fellow women, the LGBTQ community, my brothers and sisters of different races and religions, and you – I grieved for you.
As I looked at the clock striking five a.m., I thought about how you went to sleep peacefully around ten, trusting that your country would make the right decision for your future. (And sadly, when you look at the numbers, we actually did – the Trump presidency will be the result of an antiquated system that you’ll learn about in government class in 10th grade. A few states, the one I now reside in included, decided the backwards fate of an entire nation.)
You trusted us unconditionally, because we have never given you a reason not to trust us, and I am so deeply hurt that we as a nation have let you, the person I love most in this world, down.
I know you are too young to understand the implications of this election at the moment, and hopefully you can remain in your bubble of naivety for a little bit longer. But one day, when you look back at the history that was made Tuesday night – history that was made for all the wrong reasons – I know you will be angry. Believe me, I feel this anger, too. This was my first presidential election, a moment I had anxiously been waiting years for, eager to make my voice heard, and I feel betrayed by the system and by my country as a whole. With the better part of my adolescent life occurring during Obama’s terms, this was an emotion I never expected to feel on this night.
The Obama presidency taught me that change was possible if we craved it and worked together for it. The Obama presidency taught me that, despite the numerous issues our country faced (and still faces) regarding minorities, we must strive vigorously and endlessly in our fight for equality because every human is of equal worth, regardless of their gender, race, or religion. The Obama presidency taught me that compassion is the most important tool that we as humans have at our disposal, and love can triumph in the face of great adversity.
I am so sorry that it did not triumph last night.
I am sorry that the president you will have as an example of a “leader” builds his leadership – if you can call it that – on a platform of hatred.
I am so sorry that you will grow up in a country where, even if you are more qualified and more educated for a position, you still may not accomplish what you set out to gain because you are a woman. You deserve equality in all respects, from your healthcare to your wage and beyond, and I wish there weren’t still people in our country who don’t think the same.
I am so sorry that you will have friends who will continue to be petrified of being hurt or even killed by ignorant, spiteful people simply because of the color of their skin or the religion they ascribe to. While you and I face struggles as members of a minority – as being women – theirs is another battle entirely. I know you will choose to stand in unity with them in this fight, and for that I am so proud of you, but it is beyond unfortunate that, in this day and age, we still need to have this fight to begin with.
I am so sorry that our government may be about to dump an additional $5.3 trillion dollars1 to the National Debt thanks to a faulty plan guaranteed to fail, and that it won’t be the makers of this plan who suffer from its consequences, but rather you – someone who didn’t even have a voice in this election – and me and all our friends who will bear the onus one day.
I am so sorry that you will face aggressive disgust and hatred from many, rather than the support you deserve, if you find that you love someone of your same gender, or if you realize you are of a different gender than your biological sex gave you. I had thought we were making great strides forward as a country to end these ways of thinking, but I fear we are about to move great bounds backward instead. I am still trying to wrack my mind around the fact that our new vice president horrifically believes in conversion therapy. You and he may both be Christians, but you certainly worship a very different God if he cannot recognize love as love.
I am so sorry that as you enter puberty, a time already filled with great discomfort and self-doubt, your president is one who not only has consistently, publicly degraded women for their bodies and appearance, but also has been accused of sexual assault and child rape2. For you to just be learning about these concepts and to find out that your country elected a man who is a violator himself? I am fantastically enraged, and I can only imagine how you will feel.
I am so sorry that, as a child, you were constantly reminded to not be a bully to others, to treat others the way you want to be treated, to treat everyone with respect, and yet our new president bulldozed his way to the top by trampling on many just to please a select few: his fellow white, straight males who fear a changing world. He is no friend to us. He is not a leader. He is that exact bully we told you never to be.
What kind of an example have we given you?
This election went far beyond economic plans and ideologies about the environment; this election gave a sense of empowerment to hateful and dangerous group of people, and we are already beginning to witness the treacherous consequences of our decision country-wide. We as a nation have failed you, and I am so greatly sorry.
But Brooke, despite all this, I want you to know that while I am very afraid, I still have hope, and I want you to as well.
I wanted to give you a leader you could look up to during your adolescence, like I had with Obama. I fought for Hillary for many reasons and for many people, you included. She was not a perfect candidate, but she had compassion, strength, valor, and tenacity – the values our family has raised you with. My hope had been that seeing these qualities reflected in a president would cause you to see yourself in her, to know that you could do anything you wanted to do – including be in her position one day – if you worked hard enough, and to know that having these traits would get you far in life.
But since our country has not elected a president who embodies these qualities for you, I guess I will simply have to embody them myself.
Brooke, I promise you that I will continually strive to be a good example for you in all that I do.
I promise you that I will carry on the work of Obama and Hillary for a brighter future, even if our new president will not. I promise, too, that this brighter future will happen, even if things are dark right now. Obama had often said that change would not happen in one term, or two. Change takes time. It takes patience. But I will never stop striving for it, both for your sake and the sake of our country as a whole.
I promise you that I will stand tall with my brothers and sisters in the face of sexism, racism, homophobia, and xenophobia. They can attempt to silence us, but love rings louder than hatred. We will not back down. We are in the midst of a great revolution. We will win.
I promise you that, as difficult as it may be, I will not counter the hatred of Trump and his supporters with hatred of my own. As a brilliant man and renowned leader, Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., once said, “Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.” This has always been a favorite quote of mine, but it seems especially relevant today.
If there is anything that I have learned in my twenty years of life, it is that people are resilient. We have been hurt by these results, it’s true. It has proved that our country is more fractionalized than many of us had thought. But we will come together, we will heal, and then? Then, we will mobilize. We will grow strong again in unity as siblings of humanity. Trump and his followers can only dismantle our history, our culture, and us as a people if we allow him to – which, when banded together, we will not.
We the people will be leaders for you, Brooke. Since our president is not someone who you can look up to, we will be instead.
Our nation may have failed you on Tuesday, but I promise you that we will work relentlessly until you can be proud of us once more.
I still have hope, Brooke. For as long as I have love within me, I have hope.
Your sister,
Kelly