The Alpha Ro chapter of Phi Kappa Tau at Georgia Tech is currently under investigation after an email sent to members in mid-September made its way into the public sphere. The email discusses how to have a “successful fraternity party,” giving a how-to guide to ‘get with’ a lot of girls. The author of the email enthusiastically gives his “bro[s] and pledge bro[s]” highly misogynistic advice.
A snippet of his advice on dancing:
“ALWAYS USE YOUR HANDS OR ARMS TO GUIDE THEIR DANCING in order to keep in rhythm and maximize your pleasure…[t]ry to twist her hips around to face you and dance front to front. FROM THERE THE OPTIONS ARE UNLIMITED! You can make-out with her (tongue on tongue), you can stick your hand up her shirt (not right away though), you can go for a butt grab (outside or inside the shirts), or use your imagination. ALWAYS START WITH MAKING OUT!!!! NO RAPING.”
Or, for a shorter guide, the author gives the “7 E’s of hooking up,” which are (in numerical order): “encounter,” “engage,” “escalate,” “erection,” “excavate,” “ejaculate,” and “expunge.” Also, the author does give advice if any of his methods fail: “GO GET MORE ALCOHOL.”
This email is appalling. It treats women like predictable and controllable objects and solely focuses on the maximization of male enjoyment. The author’s advice completely ignores the fact that women attending parties might not want to drink, dance, or have sex with any of the people there. It’s as if the thought that a girl wouldn’t want to have a guy’s hands all over her doesn’t even cross the author’s mind.
There is not a step-by-step method to get what you want from anyone, female or male. Everyone is different and will therefore react to situations differently. Suggesting that by constantly offering girls drinks and getting them to dance will automatically entitle you to kiss/grope them is highly demeaning. The author also advocates using guilt-tactics on the girls who do not go along with his plan. On dancing, he insists that you should “always try to dance. If she does not want to dance and is with friends, say ‘Aw, that’s no fun’ (or something like that) and then ask one of her friends.”
While the author does remind the fraternity members to not rape, he does repeatedly instruct them to keep giving girls drinks. Having sex or performing acts of sex to someone who is intoxicated is rape. I repeat, it is in no way okay to purposely give someone alcohol in an attempt to have sex with them.
Once the email was leaked, the Alpha Ro chapter and national Phi Kappa Tau organization has publically disapproved of the statements made in the email. Alpha Ro placed itself on suspension and also suspended the individual member who created the email.
The author of the email sent a public apology to Georgia Tech and several other news sources.
“I am deeply sorry for the pain and embarrassment my actions and lack of judgement have caused the students at Georgia Tech and my Phi Kappa Tau brotherhood as well as those who otherwise came into contact with the email. As hard as it may be to believe, it was written as a joke for a small audience that understood the context and that it is not my nor my fraternity’s actual beliefs on the subject. I have now come to realize this is a very serious topic that should not be taken lightly.”
Austin Jackson, President of Phi Kappa Tau, said in an email to Georgia Tech’s newspaper, Technique, “The ideas expressed in this email do not in any way reflect our values or the actions of any of our members. Even though this email was intended to be satire in order to make fun of people that act this way, it is still inappropriate.”
Satire? Personally, upon reading the full email, I saw no indication of sarcasm in the author’s words and I do not believe this email should be written off as a joke that went horribly wrong. Sexism, misogyny, and rape are all still huge problems within society. It’s been a popular trend to say that highly offensive comments regarding discriminatory ideologies are only a joke, something that people should not make a big deal over. Sexism is prevalent in societies all over the world; making a joke out of it will not help dissolve it, but instead makes the matter seem trivial. It’s kind of like when you and your friend have a big argument. After it’s over, you can both joke about it later. We, as a society, are nowhere close to getting over patriarchal concepts and therefore cannot turn it into something to laugh at.
More importantly, as pointed out by Mason Elledge, President of the Interfraternity Council at Georgia Tech, and Caroline Freeman, President of the Collegiate Panhellenic Council, the fact that this email was sent is not the only issue at hand. Rather, the fact that this mentality regarding the treatment of women is so commonplace and has still gone unaddressed is a problem. Elledge and Freeman both promote for educational programs discussing the seriousness of rape culture and sexual violence.
To read the full email, click here.
To read the news article from Technique, click here.
To read the author’s full apology, click here