So, I went on 4 first dates in one week.
From what I’ve seen, “first dates” aren’t really a thing for my generation. The title of first date brings some semblance of seriousness with it. It declares a concrete romantic interest from the beginning. Instead, what often happens with people my age is “hanging out” with someone for months until one or both parties have the courage to say something.
Thinking back now, before all of this I had not been on a first date since about the 9th grade. Awkwardly asking my mother to drive me to the movie theatres just to sit in silence for two hours hardly counts. Therefore, I decided to put myself out there and set up as many dates as I possibly could, just so I could write about it.
To be completely transparent, two of these dates were with complete strangers while the other two were with people I already knew. In fact, I’m friends with them (it’s hard work setting up dates, okay?). I’d like to think that this adds to my little experiment. What marks the difference between spending time with someone in a platonic vs a romantic way?
So, without further ado, here is a run-down of all the first dates I went on.
Date #1
Type of Date: Coffee Date
Duration: 1 hour
Friend or Stranger? Stranger
This was the date I was the most nervous for. During the date I found myself fidgeting with my rings and overthinking about how much eye contact I was making with him. I did find my date to be kind and very charismatic though; he paid for my coffee and, in my opinion, has a nice way of telling stories. Looking back, I was being shyer than I usually am. Conversation would sometimes stall, but then a new topic would quickly be picked up; from our experiences with COVID to our favourite Roman emperors, I thoroughly enjoyed myself.
Date #2
Type of Date: Board Game Café Date
Duration: 4 hours
Friend or Stranger? Stranger
Adding on to my list of firsts, this was my very first date with a girl. I picked her up from her house and found myself struggling to make small talk. Later though, the conversations we had during this date were the most intimate out of all the other dates, thanks to the well-known card game, We’re Not Really Strangers. We ended up having a lot in common, especially when it came to our tastes in music. I felt as if we clicked and were feeding off of each other’s energies. I also found myself being a little cheesy trying to jokingly flirt with her. Overall, a very wholesome and pleasant first date.
Date #3
Type of Date: Lunch Date
Duration: 2 hours
Friend or Stranger? Friend
The stakes for this date were a little high since it was the first date my friend had ever been on, and I wanted to impress. At first, conversation stayed within the realm of the usual, both of us tentatively finding our footing in unfamiliar territory. Then things shifted and we got to telling stories about our lives before meeting each other. I was genuinely laughing on this date and felt as if I got to see her light up a bit. The server was perhaps not the best, but nonetheless a good date.
Date #4
Type of Date: Bowling (+ grabbing food)
Duration: 5 hours
Friend or Stranger? Friend
Prior to this date I found myself to be nervous, worrying about how this would turn out. But once the date began, I felt at ease in the presence of someone familiar. I found out that bowling as a first date with a stranger sucks; it’s just an inherently awkward activity. But regardless, the night was filled with laughter and genuine amusement. At his suggestion, we grabbed food afterward and thus the night continued. There also seems to be a second date pending, an idea I’m not at all opposed to. We’ll just have to wait and see where this goes, I suppose.
After all that I must admit, I am pretty behind on my schoolwork. But in all seriousness, this is an experience I do not regret. Yes, first dates can be awkward and scary sometimes, but I also think they are exciting and filled with potential. They are a chance to not only to get to know another person, but also to discover what you like and the qualities and traits you want to be near. So maybe try going on a couple first dates yourself! You never know what could happen.