One thing I am constantly being asked by my male friends is why I am always covering my face in pictures. If I’m sending a Snapchat, I put the text in front of my face, or completely cover myself with an emoji. On my camera roll I have my hands on my face, and just walking around every day I have to have my hair in in my face. The only response I could give was that I felt prettier while either putting focus on my eyes or drawing attention away from what I think are flaws. I have a chubbly (not a typo) round face, I also have some scars, but that doesn’t take away from my beauty as a whole. I know that I am not the only one who suffers from feeling the need to cover my insecurities in photos, so I took to the streets flaunting everything I thought to be ugly. I went a week with my hair in a bun, with no bangs, no make-up, and no odd camera angles to make my face slimmer.
Sadly as the week ended, I had no great conclusion of a journey of self-acceptance, and body positivity. I guess one thing I did realize is that women can only blame the media so much before we have to ask ourselves who is really to blame for a lack of confidence. I couldn’t even look at myself in the camera without saying that I looked gross, but when I went out I was berated with compliments. I was the one that was beating myself down, not haters on social media, I wasn’t blaming people who photoshop magazine photos, just me on my own.
I cover my face not because I don’t think I’m beautiful (because I am one bad little bee), I cover my face with my hair because I like bangs. I cover my face with emojis because I can’t physically do this:
I cover my face with my hands because at some point on my life a boy called me ugly and I still carry that with me. I learned I couldn’t blame him, it’s my fault for still dwelling on it. My friends and partners can call me beautiful all they want, but deep down I still can hear him calling me that. I also know that this is where a lot of girls get their insecurities. Someone at some point in their lives said something about their face, hair, weight, toes, whatever, and now they carry this burden with them of hiding the things that make them unique.
I guess what I learned wasn’t from the actually 7 days I went without covering my face, but was from putting this article together. I had to face the facts, and the fact I faced was that I am by own biggest critic. That’s something that everyone needs to remember. Cut yourself some slack and take that upload that selfie, tell that voice in your head to be quiet, and when you check your DMs don’t be surprised to see that loser trying to come through and see how you’ve been doing.