Oh, hey! Look, there’s a cute guy standing over there.
You’re probably thinking about what you should say. That’s the next move– a simple, yet dazzling line.
Pickup lines get a bad rep. The goal is to start conversation. You want to indicate interest and explore the possibility of meeting someone new and – maybe – creating a wonderful new relationship.
The idea of starting a conversation with a stranger or people you don’t know well can be nerve-racking. Having a good plan will help. Here are some tips:
1) Follow up a “hello” with a “how are you doing?” Don’t forget to smile. Most guys will enjoy talking a little bit about themselves. If you listen attentively to what he says, follow up questions will abound and you will be in a conversation. Mission accomplished!
2) You’re in line, waiting to order your food: A Brad Pitt-look-alike is standing behind you. Ask him: “What’s the best thing to order?” He’ll enjoy sharing his opinion on something with a female.
3) You’re both standing near a bar counter: “Can you help me get this bartender’s attention?” is a good, innocent conversation starter. This is a chance for him to help a woman out, and he’ll like that. When he responds, you thank him, and then pivot to something else, like a quick compliment about his shirt, shoes, anything you can think of and then ask him where he bought it.
4) You’re on the metro: Ask him if he knows how to get to a certain destination. (Then, SMILE) Ask him if he rides this line often. Yes, this is a repeat of number 2 and 3, but it’s worth repeating. Here’s an opportunity for a man to give a woman advice. He’ll feel good about it, too. It’s part of his genes.
5) Before class: “What did you think of the reading?” After he responds, say “Good point. I hadn’t thought about that…by the way, my name is ___________. Nice to meet you.”
6) After class: “Your comment about _________ was really interesting. Where did you come up with that idea?” Any discussion about school is a great conversation-starter. After all, both of you are students. Tap into that common experience.
7) At your next club meeting: “You know, I’m really passionate about this topic. How about you?” The odds are good that he has strong passions for the topic, too. Otherwise, he wouldn’t be at the meeting. And if he likes the topic, he’ll like talking about it with you.
8) At a party: Ask him how he knows the host. Tell him a funny story about something you did with this person. It’s very likely that the two of you share a mutual friend.
The locations to nix: Be careful at the gym, in church, and in class. Some places are not the right place to try start a conversation. Pick your spots wisely. When a guy is trying to bench-press 300 pounds, he needs to focus. When the priest is saying his homily, you don’t want to be talking or trying to start a conversation. In class, your professor may deem you as the class flirt, which is not the best collegiette move. This is common-sense, but, as Mark Twain once said, “Common sense ain’t so common.” Trying to start a conversation afterwards is best.
It’s all about the context of the situation and delivery of the line. If everything clicks, he’ll see that you’re clever and good at building rapport. Hopefully, you two will hit it off, and you’ll have a new suitor in no time.
Twitter: @julitacardenas