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4 Truths Mother-Daughter Dating Taught Me

Thank goodness for on-campus housing and apartments; another minute in our childhood homes, under the same roof as our parents, and it would have all gone down in flames on account of the daily pettiness, weekly bickering and occasional blowouts between us and our Mommie Dearests.  

But there comes a time in every woman’s life when it feels like every moment spent alone with the woman who brought you into this world, is an opportunity spent getting to know her all over again. Of course, we could never forget the smell of her clothes, her favorite movie genre or her burrito bowl order (lots of peppers, guac and sour cream on the side!). But there’s some new stuff to take notice of, too. You know, when you start dating your mother.   

  1. Nothing you do shocks your mother anymore. ​ Maybe she was up in arms about everything when you were like, 14 and way too young for anything fun and spontaneous. But now that you’re technically an adult, nothing can phase her, especially if you aren’t her firstborn (they pretty much do all the shocking for you). Go ahead, tell her you’re eloping, you joined a cult, you have a tattoo of Charles Manson on your lower back. She won’t bat one little eyelash as she utters a mere, “Hey, you’re just finding yourself.”
  2. There’s more to Moms than just being Moms. 

    Moms were (and still are) a lot of things before they were your mother: daughters, sisters, girlfriends, athletes, women, human beings and everything else under the sun. So comfort food recipes and financial advice aren’t the only things a mother lives to talk about, let alone the only things she has in common with you. 

    From politics to history to sex, there’s a lot of experience there! Sure, it’s an awkward day when you realize your mother’s libido is alive and well in the middle of a Cheesecake Factory, but once you come around, you start to laugh about it and understand that you can come to her for anything. Because wherever you are, she’s already been.

  3. She was always right, and you were always wrong. 

    The older you get combined with the more often you talk to your mom, the more you realize that every time she screamed and punished you over age-appropriate clothing, boys, education, spending and chores, she was being the rational one. And you were a spoiled brat who needed to be taken down a few pegs.

    She may be harsh sometimes, but she’s always loved you and she ain’t never lied. “If you get the chance, you should probably marry a doctor.” Truth. “Valentine’s Day is no big deal. If you want diamonds so bad, buy them yourself.” Truth. “I gave you the gift of life. You’ll never stop owing me.” Double truth.

  4. She’ll never stop nagging you, that’s just what Moms do. 

    Yes, compared to younger days, your mom is like a friend to you (a really really scary friend). But at the end of the day, you’re still her child, which means there is literally some kind of biochemistry going on in her brain that compels her to worry about you, stuff you with food and constantly tell you what to do.

    It doesn’t matter how old you get. When you head to the store together, your dress is too short. When company comes over, your room is too dirty. And every man you bring within five feet of her house isn’t just a friend, at least in her mind.  They may not always understand you, and vise versa. But they’ll always be the smartest, most powerful, most complex individuals on the planet. Thanks, Mommy!


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