Why You Shouldn’t Settle for a Situationship in College
Less than a relationship, but more than friends with clear emotions for each other is what many college students refer to as a “situationship.” While a relationship without a label may have its benefits, it can quickly become harmful when the situation lacks boundaries, respect, commitment, and courage. And not knowing where you stand in someone’s life that you care about, is guaranteed to keep you up at night.
If the above description sounds familiar to you, consider if it’s the best thing for your life right now.
- You Have Time
College, for many, is the first experience of being on your own and maturing into who you are. Learning to enjoy yourself and your time with your friends is pivotal to making your college years a prominent time in your life. If you’re hooked on someone without a label, they will hinder you from making connections with others and take time away from you that you could otherwise be spending on bettering yourself. You can’t spend the potentially best years of your life waiting for somebody to commit to you and you should never be okay with having to guess how much you mean to somebody. You are young, hot, and have plenty of time to attract people to you with your energy rather than chasing after someone who puts in a lack of effort.
- Difference in Opinions
There is nothing wrong with being friends and hooking up. However, if feelings are involved, and all they are willing to offer you is a situationship title, RUN. The Bottom line is if someone likes you, they WILL make it known. If you are waiting around for someone to wake up and make up their mind, then you are wasting time. I’m sure there will be people in your life that adore you but don’t want to commit while in college. These people think college is for dating around, and while some may hold this value, it is important to discuss with your partner beforehand if you both hold this opinion. Otherwise, one may spend too much time hoping the relationship will turn into something it will never become.
- An Increase in STRESS
College is hard enough as it is. Relationships are supposed to make you thrive and happy, and never leave you feeling unworthy or drained. If you catch yourself constantly checking your phone to see if they answer, comparing yourself to other girls they talk to, wondering why they stood you up on your hangout plans, and always contemplating what the hand holding and forehead kissing truly means, it’s time to drop them. It may feel impossible to leave, but
you do not deserve to question how someone truly feels about you.
- If They Wanted to, They Would
If you have clear feelings for someone, and verbalize them to your situationship, they should respect them. While you may think making it clear to the other that you are not a booty call, an option, or a late-night hookup, will make them respect you, then you are wrong. Ladies, what you hear is true, IF HE WANTED TO, HE WOULD. Giving all your love and care to a situationship will only make them string you along and keep you in their back pocket without ever committing. The reason they keep you around, is because they are scared to lose you because you ARE WORTHY. And if he still hits you up after telling him you are worth more than what he is offering, then he is clearly disrespecting you. It’s time to be with someone who shows that you mean everything to them or stay single waiting for the right person to come along.
Time is precious, you deserve to spend it with someone who will never put themselves in a position to lose you. You deserve someone who wants you and only you rather than seeing you as just an option. You deserve to be chosen. You deserve better than “one day.” You deserve better than unsureness. You deserve flowers. You deserve dinner dates. You deserve to know where you stand. There are too many things in this world that are mediocre, love should never be one of them.