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Artificial Beauty

Artificial Beauty

Okay, so as we all know, we live in a world where if you’re not a ten – that is, an InstaFamous model with 100,000 plus likes – then you may as well give up on life, because you’re probably fat and ugly. This statement is ridiculous for a number of reasons and requires a whole different article to simply tear it to shreds. All I will say for now, is that no one is a ten. Yes, there are beautiful people in the world (hola – jokes…!), but no one is perfect. In fact, to be truly beautiful, I think, is to be comfortable and happy in your own skin; to not compare yourself and to express yourself with confidence. If I see a boy who is confident – not cocky, that’s a different ballgame and is very off-putting – I’m more likely to find him more attractive than the boy who won’t make eye contact. Well, it’s the same for us girls, if you’re confident it’s really attractive – no what you want and who you are and you’ll be hitting the ten score cards in everyone’s book.

But, to return to the point of this article, and to take on a bit of my confinspo (confident inspiration!) then one thing, that I admittedly do myself, is construct myself with artificial means of beauty. It’s silly, it’s changing us from who we are to create an unrealistic version of ourselves which to be honest a lot of guys don’t think is all that attractive. Nothing kills the mood like running your hands through a girls hair and pulling out one of her extensions…you feel me? So I’m going to go over a few artificial beauties and see what we can maybe do instead, or least maybe tone down a little so we’re not changing ‘us’ too much…

Fake Tan

Oh the infamous ‘you’ve been tangoed’ solution that can either make you golden brown or streaky orange. The risk is great and the outcomes are unknown. I for one love a good fake tan. In fact, if I’m not wearing it, I feel gross and underdressed. It’s like I’ve gone out without my pants on – for you southerners, pants here means trousers! I use ‘SkinnyTan’ which I would highly recommend as – for me anyway – it’s a flawless finish and leaves you a perfect golden brown – and I’m constantly complimented on how tanned I am (winning!). However, this almost obsession with it is not great. Additionally, this perfect colour doesn’t last forever, after about four-five days the cracks start to show and you’re walking around with white patches where you’ve sweated if off – hot right?

Anyone who knows me, will know that in University I wear gym clothes every single day. To the point that if I’m ever in normal clothes, whether it’s just as simple as t-shirt, jeans and converse I get told how great I look because, well, people don’t ever really see me looking ‘glam’. So it raises the question, why do I need to fake tan, when I’m wearing an outfit that is predominately created for me to sweat in and therefore look terrible. Well, I’ll be the first to say, as much as I hate to admit it, I do like to look decent in the gym. I live in the weight section, so to maintain some femininity (so stereotypically wrong I know I’m sorry!) I wear make-up and try to match my gym gear. It probably doesn’t help that my foundation is about two shades to dark for my natural skin tone. No one wants to see an orange head on a white body; so I blend ‘em together to create a full bodied orange weightlifter. Cringe.

I think I need to accept and embrace my pasty whiteness. First step might be to only fake tan for special occasions – preferably in summer. It’s no good walking out as if you’ve been on a Caribbean Cruise in the middle of December – we know it’s a lie! I also should probably invest in some make up that actually matches my skin tone so that I don’t look like my head has been photo-shopped onto my body… Tip then: use in moderation. Keep it classy and make sure it works with the season. But don’t be afraid to rep the natural whiteness; I know a load of girls who wouldn’t dare touch the orange stuff and they’re gorgeous!

Fake Eye-Lashes

Okay, so I’ve only ever worn these once at my school prom and had a beautician put them on for me – thank god! I wear contact lenses so any added stress to my eyes is a big no, so that’s the first reason I don’t really wear these. However, I know some are pretty and can make your eyes pop! But, personally, not the biggest fan. If it looks like you have wings hanging off your eyes then you might want to reign it in so that you don’t catch the wind and take off…

I don’t know brands or styles, but I know there are a few ‘natural’ ones; maybe try and stick to these if you’re going to go full lashes…but with that said, unless you genuinely have no lashes for whatever reason, work what you have. The right mascara can do wonders and you’ll so much more like you! I know it can feel like you’re naked without them; I used to wear black eyeliner religiously until my friend told me I didn’t need it all the time. Even now when I go out without it, I sometimes feel like it looks like I haven’t put make up on! But it’s something you can and will get used to! Also, there is nothing grosser than used fake eyelashes. Like really, they are possibly one of the worst things I’ve ever seen/touched. On a special occasion, if you’re going for the extra ‘wow’ factor, throw a pair on, but there is such thing as ‘over done’ so make sure they’re not OTT. Less is more after all!


Acrylic nails

Firstly, they’re impractical and secondly they’re a bit creepy! Personal opinion over here, I know some people live for them – we’ve all got our loves (fake tan is my life).

I grossly, bite my nails when I’m stressed, which is basically every single day, especially when doing my dissertation – which I should be doing now, but oh well…So may nails don’t look glam. Which I HATE. I get so, so embarrassed about them. Thankfully, they’re just short they’re not like crazily bitten down to the bone. But I know some girls’ are, and I know they probably feel as uncomfortable about them as I do. So I totally understand why girls would opt for these, I’ve done it myself in the past. But for me that is the past and it’s been put to rest now. As I say, each to their own, but when you have nails that are almost as long as your fingers, it’s just not that attractive. You can’t do anything with them and the fear of catching one and pulling it off is enough to turn me off them! Additionally, they’re not all that great for your natural nail bed…your nails need a breather now and again, and that includes from just normal nail polish! I think shellac nails on your natural shape and length is so much prettier!! But if you’re like me, and don’t have a long enough to nail to actually get shellac, maybe get the acrylics but cut them down to a more realistic shape and length. Your natural nail should grow underneath. There’s also this stuff that you can put on your nails to stop you biting them because it tastes gross!!! So once the acrylics are off, soak them in that and then move on to the shellac.


Hair extensions

Admittedly, another problem of mine. I have the world’s thinnest hair. When I shower and I see stands going down the drain I fear that I’ll leave the shower bald. So last year, I got hair extensions. The proper ones they glue to your head. In fact, I got them twice, spending a pretty little £426 (all together, but still!). Firstly, I’m not a millionaire, I’m a student in debt, so these probably weren’t by best investment. But it was honestly amazing, I had never had so much hair and it had never been so long and everyone said how amazing it looked and then about one maybe one and half months past and the glue started to turn white and they started to grow out and basically they looked terrible. Every time I brushed my hair, one would fall out and I’d have to have a minutes silence for the fallen solider. My boyfriend never touched my hair, I had these extensions in all together for around six months, because he was afraid of pulling them out and to quote him ‘they felt weird’ so that’s another issue. But I did feel good despite the ugliness at the end and the added hair loss when they were taken out…I’ve given my hair a solid six month break from them now and was considering getting them for summer. But I’ve been told to embrace my hair how it is, because it’s natural and it’s me. I mean, I don’t really suit long hair to be honest…it’s really not me, I’m not all that ‘glam’ but it was just a novelty. I think I will have a break from them…but I might return to them one day HOWEVER they will be short and used to thicken my hair ONLY. So my advice to anyone who is going to get them is to first of all, make sure you have the money! And second try and keep them a natural length. There’s nothing worse than seeing natural hair end and the extensions start – it is very noticeable girls!! 

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