I sometimes feel like I’m on “Low Power Mode” like my phone. I almost need to be plugged in or I just shut down. As I reflect on my own values, I am viewing my friendships differently. My friendships should better serve me and my friends. Friendships should not deplete my battery. Who we surround ourselves with directly impacts our inner battery, so seeking out those friends that “recharge us” is crucial to our own health.
Think of a class you are taking this semester where you just do not vibe with the professor. You leave the class feeling drained. In comparison, think of a class where you don’t enjoy the content, but you love the professor. Although you may be overwhelmed with the material, the professor makes you motivated to attend class and complete the work. Friends are the same way. If you leave a hangout with your friend feeling drained, maybe don’t hang out with them as often. However, if you find a friend that makes doing difficult homework fun, keep them around.
If you leave your “friends” feeling self-conscious or down on yourself, ditch them. Or if you feel annoyed after hanging out with your friends, there might be a simple thing that is not working. I would bring it up to your friend. If they react poorly, that reflects badly upon them more than you. If that still doesn’t work, it doesn’t always mean ditching them completely. Set boundaries and see each other less.
You should feel recharged after hanging out with your friends. We all have a social battery, but you should not feel instantly low after being with a friend. Keep friends around that you can do nothing and everything with. The most mundane of things can become fun with a friend that recharges you. On the other hand, you should want to do exciting things like concerts or vacations with that friend who recharges you because you want to share those fun memories with them!
As you hang out with your friends in the upcoming weeks, reflect on if they make you feel recharged or not. I hope you are already surrounded by people who charge your battery. If you find you are not, don’t be afraid to lose those who drain you.