Growth
As people, we instinctually gravitate toward curiosity, whatever happens, to pique our interest at the time. We learn new things every day, all the time. Learning about cursive, math equations, menstrual cycles, and of course sex. Yet, nobody teaches us about behavior, how to set boundaries, how to save our own mental health, and most importantly how to value our worth. In school, we learn tools for our potential careers and to get into college, but there is so much more to know before going into the world.
For most of my life, I was curious about people. Why they did things, what caused their behavior, and how I could help them. At our core as people, we want to be good. We get punished when we’re young for not doing what we’re told. At the same time, it can be thrilling. Pushing the limits, doing the thing we know we shouldn’t, just to see if we can figure something or someone out. We think that we can do the impossible, change people’s ways, go around the rules, test the limits without any repercussions. Is it fun? Yes. It encapsulates exactly what youth is: Rebelling, learning, and realizing what we need to be the best versions of ourselves
. This growth means the things that used to thrill us just aren’t as fun. The things that we were so curious about just aren’t as interesting. As we grow we start to know what we need as people. We prioritize and manage our lives, and cut off the bad people instead of trying to heal them. We realize that as much as we wish and hope for people to change, we can’t make them.
Growing means that even though as much as we want to help people and see the good in them, we have to help ourselves first. We must create boundaries, not to push people away, but because we respect ourselves. We must realize that the temporary highs that people can give us just aren’t enough to sustain our mental state. Our inner strength comes from knowing that we value ourselves and we’re not going to let people come into our lives who ask us to save or fix them. As people, we can be independent, strong, and powerful human beings all on our own. Only people who add value, support, and genuine connection deserve to share that with you.
You can care for someone, but not have them in your life because you have grown and know the repercussions. Is it hard to say goodbye to those toxic tendencies? Yes, but with time, patience, and changing your mindset you will see your worth and never go back. People say growing pains for a reason. Start to learn about yourself inside and out: your needs, desires, wants, and what makes you happy. This is the first step to pure joy. Nothing to fix, change, or make better. We accept only greatness from now on.