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This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at KU chapter.

“Let’s stay friends” is a bad idea 

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Nope. Nope. Nope. Staying friends with an ex is one of the worst things you can do to yourself. Not only are you lying to yourself about platonic “friendly” feelings you most definitely don’t have towards each other, but do you really think you could be friends with a person you had an intense, sexual relationship with? You’ll constantly find yourself in a cycle of jealousy, confusion, and uncertainty and it definitely doesn’t help you move on from your relationship by keeping your ex in your life. Unless you’re one of the .0001% of couples that can have a healthy, non-toxic friendship after a breakup, then just go and do yourself a favor, DON’T BE FRIENDS WITH YOUR EX.

 

Social Media is not your friend 

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In this climate, it’s pretty typical for people to take their emotions and feelings of a breakup out on their Twitter feed. Do not and I mean DO NOT be that person. Expressing negative thoughts about your ex and your breakup on Twitter, Instagram, Snapchat, Facebook, literally any form of social media is super immature and only reflects poorly on yourself. Don’t give your ex the satisfaction of knowing they are on your mind when they see your social media feed is filled with posts about them. Go talk to an actual human about how you’re feeling and don’t depend on likes and shares to determine who is “winning” in a breakup. Newsflash: there is no such thing as “winning and losing” in a breakup. Do your own damn thing and mind ya own business.

 

Hooking up with other people should be done for the right reasons 

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If you think being intimate with someone else will help you move on from your ex, go for it girl. However, if you are only hooking up with other people to make your ex jealous, then you need to check yourself. Being single means doing things for yourself now, so do what you need to do, but don’t do it with your ex in mind. Be your own person!

 

Checking up on your ex constantly will do more harm than good 

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The beauty of a breakup is not having the emotional strain of worrying about a significant other anymore. If you find yourself looking back at their social media, seeing their interactions, and reading into everything you find, go ahead and give them that unfollow. It’s all about self-control, honey. You will only make yourself more upset by investigating into things you really don’t want to even know. It’s best to go cold turkey, no communication, no check-ups. Don’t even bother asking how they are doing, what they are up to, or if their dog misses you. You broke up, girl, this is just how things are supposed to be.

 

Just remember, you cared for this person at one point in your life and most likely still do. Respect each other’s space and give yourself time to reflect. Breakups are like ripping off band-aids. It hurts like a bitch at first, but just like every annoying, painful, ugly scab you get in life, it takes time for it to heal. Besides, being single in college is awesome and you’ll learn a lot about yourself.  

 

Sheli is a sophomore at the University of Kansas and this is her first year writing for Her Campus.