Just earlier this week, on Sunday, December 10th, a short story called Cat Person was published in the New Yorker. The story, written by Kristen Roupenian (pictured in the thumbnail), was told through the thoughts and actions of college sophomore Margot (20) and her temporary relationship (of sorts) with a much older man named Robert (34). This story began to gain attention almost immediately- many readers took to Twitter to express their fascination with the way it was written, and in some cases, their disdain. Certain parts of Cat Person left a lot of MEN particularly wounded, and a Twitter account called Men React To Cat Person was created to highlight some of these responses.
A primary focus for a lot of male readers, one example of which you can see above, is centered on the way that the story ended. Ultimately, after uneasy contemplation and a bit of a push (okay, more than a bit) from her roommate, Margot eventually quits Robert cold turkey and stops all communication with him. Later, an intoxicated Robert sends Margot a series of inquisitive texts that begin civil enough (“maybe I don’t have the right to ask but I just wish you’d tell me what it is I did wrong”) and quickly turn hostile (“Are you fucking that guy right now? Answer me”) before he eventually calls Margot a whore and gives up.
To many male readers, this alarming and delayed reaction from Robert was justified by Margot’s sudden disappearance and lack of explanation- some even went as far to say that her character read like a sociopath who didn’t care about Robert’s feelings. It’s not hard to infer that hurt feelings on Robert’s behalf could come from personal experience for a lot of men who have experienced modern dating or a modern breakup in one way or another. Maybe a few of them see themselves in Robert, and by this story, were reminded of a time they were cut off without explanation. Plenty of readers also felt that men were misrepresented by Robert’s character, and as seen by the example below, that the fact that women are never the ONLY ones put in dangerous situations is dismissed by this story.
Unfortunately, these various readers are missing the author’s point. The story is not about the AFTER of Robert and Margot’s relationship, it is about the DURING. In an interview with newyorker.com, Roupenian explains that a major theme of this story is uncertainty, that Margot does not know very much about Robert at all, and that the moment she knows, without a doubt, Robert’s true colors “is the point at which the story ends“. Throughout the story, Margot struggles to interpret Robert’s feelings/actions and adjust herself to accommodate them as they change. She does this in many different ways, varying from replying to his texts in a timely matter to eventually having unwanted sex with him simply because telling him she wanted to stop seemed like it would bring on unwanted consequences.
In short, this is a story about the speculation that comes with modern dating and the inner monologue of nervous justification that women experience with every confusing or unwanted encounter that comes with it. It reveals the “mental gymnastics” (as told by elle.com) that women put themselves through in order to spare the feelings of their partners and avoid the consequences of hurting a man’s feelings, regardless of what they might be. The unfortunate truth is that many and most women are able to relate to Margot’s character in this story and have experienced the same things that were described in uncomfortable detail in Cat Person. A large positive about the publishing of this story was that it has opened a dialogue about how universal occurrences like the ones Margot experienced are for women, especially those who have entered the modern online dating world. If we didn’t know before, we know now that we are never alone. Hopefully, someday, it will take less drastic measures and uncomfortable circumstances to bring women together, but this story did it effortlessly.