Let’s face it: We’re getting older. We’re living on our own, we’re cooking our own meals, we’re doing our own laundry, but most importantly, we’re getting invited to weddings.
Couples we went to high school with are now reconnecting with us to get our addresses for their save the dates. These should be happy occasions, but every once in awhile we hear horror stories of the bridezilla.
The term “bridezilla” was coined in the 1990s to mean “a woman whose behavior in planning her wedding is regarded as obsessive or intolerably demanding,” according to the Oxford Dictionary. It’s, obviously, a combination of the words “bride” and “Godzilla,” and bridezillas have become so prevalent in modern culture that WE tv has made an entire reality show based around these women.
So what turns an otherwise well-mannered woman into an overstressed, terrifying monster of a bride? Leah Grady, a student who works in the wedding business, had a pretty simple explanation.
“I understand why some women go bridezilla. They have expectations,” Grady said. “And when those expectations aren’t met, they flip.”
But these expectations of having a dream wedding have interesting roots, says Grady.
“It is all Pinterest’s fault. And a little bit of the fault goes to Facebook,” Grady said. “Women start planning their weddings before they meet their husbands. And they watch everyone else’s wedding happen and do everything they can to make sure their day is bigger and better… They get so caught up in impressing their friends, family, and the Internet world, they forget that they are marrying their love.”
Leah not only works in the wedding business, but is planning her own wedding — or should I say elopement?
“My fiancé, Tanner, and I are eloping on March 15… We have a little money saved up, but we found it silly to blow our money on one day,” Grady said. “And we really just wanted to make it about us.”
Samantha Meyer is a KU student who recently got married. Not only was she under pressure to plan her wedding, but she had to juggle two semesters of college courses, too. Becoming a bridezilla was something she always tried to avoid.
“I tried to keep everyone involved without being needy. I was very open with my wedding party from the beginning; I told them what I would pay for, and explained that since I’m a full-time student and only a part-time employee, I may need them to help with some of their attire,” Meyer said.
While Meyer kept her cool through the planning, she says she can understand why some brides can’t keep it together.
“It can definitely be overwhelming,” Meyer said. “As a couple, the cost was the most stressful part for us, so I can understand why people give into that stress and take it out on others.”
After hours of reality television and countless stories, becoming a bridezilla may seem inevitable, but Meyer and Grady agree on one important piece of advice.
“Don’t stress small details,” Meyer said. “The ceremony goes by so quickly, and all you will care about on that day is walking down the aisle and seeing that special person waiting for you. You’ll forget all about the details.”