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Tips on how to have a successful first date (The Do’s and Dont’s)

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Kean chapter.

Some people say that being single can be a great thing in life and that you avoid a lot of relationship issues. Then there are some people that jump at the opportunity to hook you up with someone that they are best friends with, or one of their co-workers, and when faced with these situations you are probably thinking “I can find my own date, back off!”. The reason why most people react so defensive when it comes to blind dating, is because they are simply not ready, or have first date jitters.

First date jitters are normal especially if you have been single for a few years and that is why I decided to provide you with three do’s and dont’s for first dates.

Do #1: dress up comfortable, but classy on a first date

When going on your first date you don’t want to over dress, but at the same time you don’t want to underdress and show up wearing sweat pants with a big tee shirt. It is always important to make a great first impression and in order to do this you need to dress up for the occasion. If your date wants to take you out to dinner, it is important that you dress up professional mixed with casual. For example, a perfect outfit for a dinner date would be a sweater or blouse, with nice pants, and flat shoes. I recommend flat shoes because you don’t want to be walking around the restaurant complaining that your feet hurt because of the fact that you have on five inch high heels!

 

If you are doing an outdoor activity I recommend that you wear sneakers with your outfit, and instead of a blouse a more simple styled shirt. The point is that you need to break the shy barrier and ask your date where you are going, along with the activity so you can feel comfortable when you step out with them in public.

Don’t #1: don’t wear an outfit that shows off too much skin

When you go on your first date, you don’t want to show off too much from your cleveage, or wear a really short skirt that shows off your legs because it will leave the wrong impression on the person you are on your date with. You want to leave things to the imagination and you want to be respected first before you decide to dive head first into the relationship. Once you begin to go on consistent dates with this particular individual and get to form a stronger connection with them, then you can begin to wear shorts and skirts that show off some skin. You need to take it one step at a time to see if the connection is true or not, and if it could lead to a strong relationship in the future.

Do #2 Form get to know you conversations before going on your first big date

Before you go out on your first date, it is important to ask general questions about the person you are interested in, so you can avoid going out with a psycho! Before you go on your first date, you should work on developing a friendship first. During the first couple of conversations with your potential first date, ask them questions like…”What are your favorite hobbies?” “ Did you play any sports during your childhood?” “Are you in college?” These are the type of questions that are perfect for ice breakers!

Don’t # 2: Don’t ask about their previous relationships and why they did not work out

Although you may want to know everything about your date, you don’t want to ask them about their previous relationships on the first date. This is a major turn off for men because it probably took them months to get over their previous break up and they don’t want to rehash that pain all over again. If you want to know some information about their relationship history, ask them a month after your first date in order to know how serious you are about the new person in your life.

Do #3 help to pay for the first date

Some ladies tend to have this perception that men need to pay for the first date, but that tends to be a major turn off for most guys. Ladies it is nice to help your date pay for your meal, or the activity that you are going to participate in for that night or day. It shows that you care and are not into being spoiled. Now if the guy insists on treating you for the date, then let him, but don’t be shy to offer your help.

Don’t #3: don’t order an expensive meal and drink on your first date

Ladies if you order an expensive meal and drink on your first date, your date will just think that you are taking advantage of them. If you want something expensive to drink then you should pay for it and the same thing with the meal. The economy is in bad shape and it is tough to get a job, plus a lot of people have bills to pay and should not have to worry about spending like $50 on a small date. Don’t be selfish.

There are a lot more do’s and dont’s for first dates, but these are the top three most important do’s and dont’s to remember so that way you have a wonderful first date. If you follow these steps I guarantee you that you will land into a really long friendship that could lead into a strong relationship. If you don’t follow these rules then the downside is that you can wind up like this…

 

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I received my Associate's degree in Liberal Arts Journalism at Middlesex County College. I have a variety of Journalism experience. I was in charge of children's newsletter at a summer camp program. I worked on a news report at MCC about a program called "Give Kids a Smile" and this program provided free dental care to children. I am great at digital photography, interviewing, and networking. I also wrote for two school newspapers.The first was "Quo Vadis" for Middlesex County College. I am currently a second time writer for "The Tower" newspaper at Kean. I am currently the Vice President of Her Campus for the Fall semester 2013 and during the Spring I will be the President of Her Campus Kean magazine. This May 2014 I will be graduating with my Bachelor's degree in Communications/ Journalism.