This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Jefferson chapter.
Everyone who has been in a relationship knows that breakups suck, plain and simple. From personal experience, I can say this with the utmost certainty. Oftentimes as well, even though this is a period of heartache, it can also in a way be enlightening and a time for growth and self-discovery. So, for anyone out there going through a breakup and needs a little pick me up, this one’s for you.
- It is okay to feel: Going through a breakup comes with all of these emotions before, during, and after. And even though sometimes we may hate the way we feel about it, it is important to know that every single feeling that you feel during this process, is okay. Everyone handles this situation differently because every situation is different. Some feel anger, others sadness, and then there’s those who feel happiness and a sense of freedom. Going through a breakup for one person could be the worst moment of their life, and for someone else, the best. So, no matter what, just remember that all of those feelings, good or bad, are normal.
- Find a support system: I know for me personally, the people I surround myself with helped me the most when I was going through the motions of my breakup. Something to remember is that no matter how strong you are (and trust me I know how strong you are) having the emotional support from friends and family really does make a difference. There were days when, as cliche as this may sound, I didn’t think I was going to be able to get through it. And despite every negative thought I may have had, I had everyone in my circle making it all feel okay. Even if it was just a silly text from one of my friends, it meant the entire world to know that I had people who loved me sticking it out with me while I got myself through it.
- Distract yourself: A valuable lesson my mom taught me when I was enduring my most recent breakup, was that distractions are an incredible tool to help the time pass as you power through it. Little things like downloading a game on your iPhone, or watching your favorite movie, always helped me when I had this nagging urge to reach back into the past. Whatever it is that makes you happy, that you genuinely enjoy doing, do it! Hey, if it helps, do it 50 times in a row! I found it to be an easy solution to help time go by faster to allow for things to hurt less. It also takes your mind off of it for a little while, and those small moments of relief really got me through in the long run.
- Time heals all: A recurring theme addressed here is time. Time is a bittersweet thing. Sometimes, we want time to fly, and others, we wish it would stop dead in its tracks. But an important thing to take away from this is that time does heal all. That can also be kind of bittersweet too, at least for me, because I was at a place where I just wanted to fast forward to a time when I would feel okay again, because I knew it was possible. No matter what though, that time eventually passes, and you will find yourself in a place where you feel like yourself, or maybe even a new version of yourself, again.
- You are going to be okay: I think the most important thing to take away from this, is that you will be okay. No matter how horrible it may feel right now, it will get better. And yes, I know how cliche that sounds and how repetitive that is, but it is the truth, and I am speaking from personal experience. I was at a point in my life, during that breakup, when I didn’t know when, or if, things were ever going to be okay again. To my pleasant surprise, things have turned out even better than I could have ever imagined. Coming out on the other side, I can say with certainty that I am grateful for how things turned out. I love the woman I am becoming because of this, and I know you can love the person you will become after this too! :)