Dear Abby

Dear Abby,

Lately I have noticed that my roommate has been going to a lot of parties and coming home in the early hours of the morning extremely intoxicated. This happens usually five times a week. I’m really starting to get worried about her drinking habits, but I don’t know if it’s my place to say anything. When she is sober, she seems depressed and doesn’t want to get out of bed. Is my roommate an alcoholic? If so, what do I do? She’s been like a sister to me and I would hate to see anything bad happen to her.


Roommate in a Rut


Dear Roommate in a Rut,

This is definitely a tricky situation on your part. It is natural to worry about those who you love, especially when it comes to their health. When it comes to alcoholism and other forms of addiction, sometimes it can be scary to try and approach the person struggling. One thing to remember is that it is hard to get someone who is struggling help if they don’t want it. It can be a touchy subject for some and can cause them to shut down. If you do choose to say something, do not take an aggressive approach. Perhaps say something along the lines of, “Hey, I noticed you’ve been going out a lot. Is something up?” Try not to bring up the drinking. Also, you can offer to do things together instead of going out, such as having a girl’s night in or going on a new adventure. That can help lift her spirits and keep her away from the alcohol. If this doesn’t work and the behavior persists, perhaps it is best to contact her family and tell them what is going on. This may hurt your roommate’s feelings or cause some tension, but her health is more important. If you want more advice, try contacting the Alcohol and Drug Help Line at or (206)-722-3700. I hope things change for the better. Addiction and alcoholism are hard on everyone involved. Just try to show your support as much as possible. Patience and love go a long way.

Love & Lipstick,