You’ve had a nagging feeling in the back of your mind that things were not right for the past few weeks. Suddenly, he’s too busy to even send a simply text and your hour long Skype dates have become awkward small talk. You confront him and the truth comes out: he doesn’t want to be in this relationship anymore. You’ll go through those expected stages: shock, anger, depression. It’s a lot to go through on your own. Fortunately, here are a few tips to help you deal with the aftermath so you don’t have to go it alone.
1. Delete, Delete, Delete
Get rid of all his previous texts messages, emails, anything that’s going to remind you of him. This includes deleting his number, and un-friending him from Facebook too. Long distance relationships (or LDR) thrive over social media, and you will feel the empty void of your significant other’s texts, calls, Skype messages, etc. Anyone who has been through a breakup can tell you that stalking your ex over the Internet just picks open the scab.
2. Stay Silent
This part is especially hard for LDR since you were most likely always in communication, but removing yourself from him or her will help you heal. Go 30 days without any contact from your ex. I’m serious about this. Even if it’s just an innocent “can I get my stuff back” text. Do. Not. Contact. Him. Enlist the help of a patient friend to help you through the next 30 days.
3. Allow Yourself To Cry
Emotions have an annoying habit of coming out of the blue and crashing down on you. You’ll have your good days, and you’ll have your bad days. Going from ‘committed’ to ‘single’ is a hard transition to make, and no one expects you to bounce back to your old, happy self right away. But don’t allow your bad days to rule your life.
4. Don’t Shut Out Your Friends
That’s what friends are for! You are going to need people to lean on during your grieving period. So open you mouth and vent to them. Have a girls night out (or in) to lighten your mood. Allow your friends take care of you when things get really tough.
5. Invest Time In Yourself
Don’t waste your time thinking about what you could have done to make him stay. Think about yourself instead. Maybe this is the perfect time to try P90x- and get all that negative energy out. Re-style your entire bedroom. Start writing an online blog. Just do something that will occupy your mind and get you going again. The time you set aside to talk to your ex is now free, so get involved with something that you’ve always wanted to try or know you love, and that will occupy all that time set aside. Right now, you need to do what’s best for you.