It’s every single girl’s favorite time of year … Valentine’s Day. We have finally recovered from the heartbreak of another kiss-less New Years, and now we are confronted by an entire day of couples rubbing their love in our very single faces. As if the PDA in this world wasn’t bad enough, we now have a holiday that encourages it. Like most single women, I was planning on spending my Valentine’s Day crying into my pillow, throwing darts at a picture of every man who has ever done me wrong. However, after throwing myself a pre-Valentine’s Day pity party, I have decided that I will not be spending my Valentine’s Day in seclusion sending awful thoughts to the opposite sex. I will, in fact, leave my house/bed. And, because I feel the pain of all my single ladies out there, I am going to share my ideas to make this Valentine’s Day bearable, and save you all the time it takes to decide which illness to fake that day to avoid leaving the house.
Spring for…
both the manicure and the pedicure. Not only will you look and feel great afterward, but you also get to hang out with a bunch of women who love to gossip, and totally want to hear about the asshole who dumped you last month. Go in for a new shade of red, and receive a free therapy session.
Splurge…
on that hot outfit you pinned earlier this month, and have been drooling over ever since. Nothing will make him angrier than seeing that you’ve got even better looking.
Calories…
Are non-existent. Enough said.
Go Out…
with your other single friends. Although you risk the chance of being surrounded by disgusting couples flaunting their love, there may be an equally single man surrounded by equally disgusting couples. Can you say love connection?
I know you were all hoping to spend the day curled up on your bathroom floor in a puddle of your tears, but that would only make you even more pathetic. Get out and have a day for yourself. If you spend the day focusing on yourself, you won’t have any time to stalk his new (less attractive) girl on Facebook. Happy Valentine’s Day, ladies!