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The Brospective: Where Have All the Good Guys Gone?

Where are all the nice guys?
Have you checked the friend zone lately? I know it’s bad etiquette to answer a question with a question but, seriously, us “nice guys” seem to end up there on the regs (regular). It’s not to say the friend zone is bad in all cases, because without it friendships between men and women couldn’t exist. But on the chance you’re actively seeking a good boyfriend, you may find your potential suitor conveniently bundled up in the neighborhood of comradery, that is to say the friend zone.

What is a bromance?
A bromance is analogous to women’s “besties!” It’s our bro that, if we’re not with our lady, consumes the rest of our free time. Said bro becomes our male support in an otherwise crazed society of testosterone.

What does it mean when a guy says, “I don’t want a girlfriend right now,” or, “I’m not ready for a relationship?”
The simple answer is just that; your wooer isn’t interested in a relationship, or a girlfriend (hopefully both if he’s saying it). Although modern thinking dictates that we, men, are all pigs and want nothing more than to “score” with as many women as possible before we die, that is not always the case. Granted some men leave that precedent, but men do have hearts too and sometimes they are not ready, or don’t feel up to a full-fledged, FBO (FaceBook Official) relationship. This first interpretation is sincere and means nothing against you, but speaks to where the man is at in his life. Now, where there is a guy telling you the truth, there is also a guy that uses this as defense mechanism. Just as women don’t always say when they’re not interested in us to protect our “feelings,”—I say that as if we don’t have them—we too can do the same. The intentions are good: to protect your feelings, but it becomes confusing. Plain and simple, what he could be saying is that he’s not interested in you romantically. It is comparable to when women make excuses why they are busy and can’t go out with us. Both sexes can learn honesty. Even though the preferred end result is not to hurt anyone’s feelings, the means to which the result is achieved is built on a lie. That just makes the situation confusing. The end doesn’t justify the means, as the infamous “they” say. If we were both more straightforward with the other, than there’d be no lack of understanding… and probably no more questions for me (on second thought, lie all you want*)! The third option is the man just being true to the game. OH, you know the game I’m talking about. Women want what they can’t have—an idea that has surfaced in every article of mine—so this guy may be trying to seem unobtainable. This is also a lie, similar to the second explanation, but the desired end is different. This is the sign of a “playa.” Don’t get me wrong, to an extent the game is good, but when it involves playing with emotions—hence “playa”—that’s when he is in the wrong entirely. Plus, he may even be using this line on other women, which, in my opinion, doesn’t make him a man but makes him a boy; he has not grasped manhood. Leave him be. The way to react to all these possible analysis is to give the guy some space. It doesn’t mean you can’t be friends and maybe even the slight distance will make the heart grow fonder. If it doesn’t work out, don’t worry; there are plenty of great men out there (check the friend zone). *Don’t really lie. Lying is wrong, seriously.

Why is it that whenever I am a little bit crazy, my boyfriend always blames it on “that time of the month?”
It either really is “that time of the month,” or it’s all we have to explain the outrage. We don’t understand women, and that’s as close as we’ll get to it.

My boyfriend says he prefers when I don’t wear a lot of make-up. Is he being serious?

Here there are two options to his meaning. One, he really likes you without make-up. In that case, go ahead and remove some make-up. It can’t hurt; it’s probably better for your skin anyway. Then there is always the alternative interpretation, probably the more likely of the two options; he doesn’t recognize when you’re wearing make-up. It’s not our fault we don’t understand make-up and what it does. I can speak from personal experience that only a trained male eye can spot copious amounts of make-up caked on a lady’s face or even a small amount. He may be trying to be sweet. Either way, go ahead and wear less make-up. You don’t have to give up make-up completely, but the least it will do is train your boyfriend’s eye as to make-up’s effect.

Are you single?
Currently? yes; but, I’ll have you know the application process to be my number one lady is rigorous.

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