One of the hardest things about loving someone or having a crush on them is that you see them as perfect, even if they treat you poorly. So many of us college age students make the mistake of holding on to someone despite the numerous red flags they present us with. As difficult as it can be to let go, we need to hold ourselves in a higher regard and know that we deserve to be treated better. Here are seven things to keep in mind that will show you that your current crush isn’t worth your time:
1. He Puts You DownI specifically remember a time when I was on the phone with my boyfriend (now ex-boyfriend) and I told him that I had decided to treat myself to some cookie dough for dessert. In response to this lighthearted comment he said, “Well, you aren’t a freshman anymore, but the junior fifteen is definitely a thing…” I was so hurt by what he said, but when I confronted him about it his defense was that he was joking. Joking or not, there is no excuse for your significant other making you feel bad about what you do; especially when it deals with what you eat or how you look. If that is the case, #byefelipe!
2. He is Overly CriticalIt never feels good having someone analyze all that you do. I have previously been told that I talk too much and that I’m too “agreeable” of a person. This began to make me feel bad because I started to think that I was doing something wrong. Then, I realized that I do love to talk and I value my ability to keep an open mind, even if that means I’m “agreeable”. These things make me who I am and I want to be with someone who appreciates me for those little things, not someone who tries to change or criticize them.
3. He Compares You to Other Girls This is a big no-no. You want to be with someone who is proud to be with you because you are you, not someone who takes what you have and compares it to another girl they know or even worse, someone they have been with in the past. Wait for the guy who treats you like his everything and only has eyes for you!
4. He Doesn’t Put In The EffortYou like this guy and you think he may be interested, but lately you are the only one reaching out and it’s starting to get annoying. When this happens, take two steps back and wait for him to put in the effort. If someone genuinely likes you, you shouldn’tbe the only one putting forth all of the time and effort; relationships are a mutual thing.If he can’t do this for you, he isn’t worth it.
5. He Gives You Mixed SignalsThis one is a biggie, a very annoying biggie. Mixed signals could mean a bunch of things, but my general rule of thumb is: If a guy likes you, you will know. When guys know what they want, they go after it. If you’re talking to someone and they continue to make you question how they feel about you, take a step back and give the situation some space.
6. He Only Reaches Out When It Is Convenient For Him:Having a crush who goes weeks without talking to you, then randomly sends you a “Hey, how are you?” text is not the type of crush you want to keep around. Friendship is not about reaching out to someone when it is convenient for you and that is especially true in romantic relationships. The next time this guy randomly pops back into your life, you may want to reexamine the extent of this sporadic communication game McDreamy is playing.
7. Being Around Him Doesn’t Make You A Better Person:Lucky number seven combines the six reasons I have listed above. When someone really cares about you and you really care about them, happiness, smiles, and laughter radiate from you. You not only feel good about the relationship you have, but you feel good about yourself. We are worth more than we give ourselves credit for and we need to start holding ourselves accountable. If you are going to be with anyone, be with someone who makes you feel like the wonderful woman you are!