As a woman in my early twenties, I have felt a tremendous amount of pressure to adhere to certain milestones that society sets for us. It feels like we’re supposed to have it all figured out — from jobs to relationships — by the time we walk across that stage and are handed our diplomas. The anxiety of this social pressure, oftentimes, can loom over us and cloud our vision of the future. As a graduating senior, I’ve felt all the same twenty-year-old-scaries that most of you feel as well. But, throughout my college journey and early twenties, I’ve learned some valuable lessons. It hasn’t always been easy, but during those tough times, I’ve held onto a few mantras that have kept me going.
So, I’m excited to share with you my five pieces of advice that will help soften the trials and tribulations of being in your early twenties and graduating college.
1. Embrace Failure
Failure is inevitable in life but can also be a valuable learning experience. Don’t be afraid to take risks and try new things, even if you’re not sure if you’ll succeed. Each failure is an opportunity to learn and grow, and it will make your eventual successes all the more rewarding.
2. Don’t let imposter syndrome win
Have you ever felt like you don’t belong or don’t deserve to be where you’re at? That’s your imposter syndrome talking. Let me explain: according to Oxford’s definition, imposter syndrome is “the persistent inability to believe that one’s success is deserved or has been legitimately achieved as a result of one’s own efforts or skills.” You have to remember that you are where you are because of the challenges you’ve overcome and your ability to make something of yourself. So don’t let your imposter syndrome get the best of you, you are not your self-doubt.
3. You are working to live, not living to work — read that again.
Our world has a really good way of expecting us to love working. Well, news flash: we’re all just humans living on a floating rock in space that no one knows hardly anything about. Your short time here on earth is supposed to be one of new discoveries and experiences and full of life. It’s important not to get caught in a vicious cycle of living each day just for work. Find time for yourself and the people around you.
4. Knowledge is Power
As we merge into the professional workforce and away from the educational scene, learning may not always be our number one priority at all times. But it’s important to remember that knowledge is the key to success and growth. It’s a way for us to better the world and connect to the people and the world around us as it continues to shift and change.
5. Be gentle
Be gentle on yourself and trust that everything will fall into place, you are where you are supposed to be. The universe always has divine timing. You don’t have to have everything figured out. Not at 20, not at 22, not at 25, not at 30 and not at 45 either. Be gentle with yourself and take your challenges and self-growth one day at a time. This is something I wish someone would’ve told me early on because it would have saved me so much stress and self-criticism.
Life is a journey full of challenges, triumphs, and personal discovery. I’m here to tell you that you don’t need to have it figured out. We’re all humans, and this is all our first-time experience of life itself. With these five pieces of advice in mind, you’ll be well on your way to creating a life that is gentle and full of self-growth and love.