Ah, the Holiday Season. It’s time for singing as loudly as physically possible, for gift giving, a season for cookie baking, and purposefully wearing the most atrocious looking sweaters on the planet, and of course its the time of the year where all of your family gets together to feast and be merry… and ask as many embarrassing questions about your life as physically possible. And although “Do you have a boyfriend yet?” “How are classes going?” and “What’s your GPA?” are all equally cringe worthy, there is one question that never seems to fail at being vomit inducing.
“What are you going to do with that English degree?”
Well gee whiz Uncle What’s-his-name! I just don’t have a single clue what to do with the major I’m spending four whole years learning about. Especially since I came in to college majoring in Psychology with a concentration in Neuroscience (which I was very good at but hated) just because, I too once asked myself: “How does one get a job as an English Major?” But such is the plight of all those who are much better at linking words together than at solving equations.
What’s even worse is that all of my family members are math and science people. My mom is an accountant, so is one of my uncles. My father was an electrical engineer. My aunt is a biology professor, as is one of my cousins. It goes on and on. So while they are having riveting conversations about finance and micro-bacteria I’m sitting in the corner like, “Hey so She’s the Man as a modern interpretation of Twelfth Night, am I right?” To top it off one of my best friends always comes to family celebrations. She is a Computer Engineering major at Princeton. I’ll just take my comprehensive version of The Canterbury Tales and sit over here.
It’s not just during the Holidays I get bagged on about my choice of major, that’s just when it’s the worst. No, English Majors fall under constant fire for picking a major many see as trivial or easy. Most even have a list of insults on hand that people have frequently used against them. Here’s mine:
1.“What do you even do with an English degree?” What do you do with a Biology degree? Or a Math degree? Or any other degree, for that matter? I’m going to obviously try and find a job. I just might find one I don’t hate.
2. “So you want to teach?” There is nothing wrong with teaching. In fact, I think it takes an incredible type of person to be a teacher, a person I am not. I know I don’t have the attention span or the patience for teaching. So why does enjoying stories and writing mean the only thing I can do is teach others about them?
3.“You must be planning for grad school then?” I mean I would love to go and probably will eventually, but why does my major make people think I have to? To get a more “job orientated” degree. Well news flash: Every field needs a good writer. Editing, publishing, advertising, marketing, public relations, communications, and so many others all involve writing well. So while I’m going to need some killer internships, just like any college student, to secure a job after college, I’m confident I’ll find one.
4.“Oh, you’re majoring in English?” Uh. Yeah. *insert side eye* Do you have a problem? This is usually followed by remarks that make you feel that because you are majoring in English, the person who asked you this thinks you aren’t as smart as the students in the science department. And while yes, the principles of Organic Chemistry are far above my head; I’m guessing the underlying allegorical principles of The Faerie Queen are above yours. Just because my brain works differently doesn’t mean I’m not as intelligent as you.
5.“Can you help me write/edit my paper?” Every once in a while I would love to edit your paper because seeing how other people write, helps my writing, and I enjoy being a good friend. But if you are trying to make me write that thing for you? Step back. I’m an English major boiiiii, meaning I have about 4 other papers I have to write this week without breaking a sweat. Like a ~boss~
6.*Uses incorrect grammar/spells something wrong* “I thought you were an English major?” This one drives me right up a wall. I’m not a Grammar major, nor am I a Spelling Major. I’m also human, and besides that probably the worst speller in North America (at this point I’d like to stop and thank Jesus, Spell Check, and Autocorrect for getting me this far in life. Amen). I am an English Major, which means I study the world’s great works of literature and try to find meaning and beauty in these pieces of art. I just also happen to know how to write one hell of a paper about it.
Sometimes majoring in what you love isn’t easy. Sometimes it can be scary and lead to ridicule from your family or your friends. Trust me I know, I’ve been there. But it’s also your life, and majoring in something you hate to make the people around you happy might not be the way to live it. At the end of the day, majoring in something that makes you happy, is much more likely to lead to a job you enjoy and can be successful in.
So although I will probably be annoyed by the flack I will undoubtedly receive at the dinner table on Christmas Eve, I will take it in stride, maybe even throwing a little Shakespeare at them like: “We are such stuff as dreams are made on, and our little life, is rounded with a sleep.” Meaning: life is short and when you die not many people will remember you, so do what make you happy, even if that means reading The Tempest in your spare time.