Giving yourself grace. Self-care. Me time.
Our generation throws these terms around quite often, and rightfully so. In my own recent battle with anxiety, these concepts-giving myself grace, self-care, and me time-have been crucial. However, as overachieving, conscientious young women, I feel we have lost sight of the true meaning behind these concepts.
Giving yourself grace, self-care, and me-time, are supposed to be there for you, not the other way around. A few days ago, I found myself becoming frustrated with myself because I had forgotten to do my meditation journaling before bed the night before. I felt myself regressing back into my anxiousness at its worst-irrational, angry, and self-shaming. Then, I realized-all these rituals we establish for ourselves are supposed to be an escape from commitment. I don’t need to shame myself for not journaling one night, or not putting on my pajama set and candles and eating fruit. Remember: you are just as put-together if you are wearing a Croads ketchup-stained t-shirt (me last weekend) as you are in a cutesy Roller Rabbit set.
“Put-together” as an aesthetic is an illusion: all that putting yourself together means is you are working to be good: to yourself, to others, and with the attitude you approach your day with. If something is burdening you, don’t be afraid to let it go. I myself know it’s easier said than done-in high school, I was president of every club, every committee, captain of every team I was on, and I had thousands of community service hours. I was also in a constant state of exhaustion and never had time to socialize-weekends were spent recovering from the busy weeks. Here at Holy Cross, I am president of zero clubs. I am on no club sports teams. I am a member of HerCampus, and have signed up recently for Working for Worcester’s Build Day-and that’s pretty much where it ends. I have discovered how much I can handle at this point in my life, even if it’s less than what others are juggling, and have learned to stop fighting it. I had another commitment that became too much for me, and I recently let it go, something I never would have previously done. The key to actually giving yourself grace, self-care, and me time, is to not compare your journey with someone else’s. Being a sustained, healthy, fulfilled YOU with a few less leadership roles is more important than being a stretched thin, miserable, shell of you. Become involved in organizations that replenish you-not drain you-like what I’ve found in HerCampus. Yes, any commitments you take on can stack your resumé; however, they should also stack that much more important resumé inside you-the one that nourishes you (that isn’t based on catering for outside acceptance or approval. I hope this advice resonates with anyone reading this who has similar struggles).
Remember, you are worthy of truly giving yourself grace, in every way.