So. You’re going on Spring Break. Plans have changed a million times, you’ve been left out twice, your destination has changed 8 times, you’ve had three different houses, been going with a hundred different people, been in twelve fights about sleeping arrangements and driving arrangements, you’ve spent over three hundred bucks and you’re not even there yet, you’ve ripped at least half of your hair out with all the planning… BUT you’re finally going on Spring Break. This week is going by slower then ever but in a few short day’s you’ll be basking in the sun and wearing obnoxious neon clothes in one of many popular Spring Break destinations. Here’s some advice from yours truly on how to make your Spring Break the best it can be. Listen to me, I’m right I promise.
1. DO NOT: Join that Wet T-shirt contest. Want attention? Get it a different way. Do not listen to the obnoxious frat guys in your group from school….they just want to see your boobs.
2. DO: Leave the expensive shit home. Sure you’ll look hot in your Marc Jacobs sunglasses but no one wants to hear you crying because you lost your $200 sunglasses in the Gulf of Mexico.
3. DO NOT: Do anything you wouldn’t do back on campus. Don’t get me wrong, Spring Break is a time when you should have fun. Go a little crazy but don’t throw all your inhibitions out the window on the plane ride down. This isn’t Vegas; what happens on Spring Break 2012 will come back with you. Make sure you don’t lose your dignity in paradise.
4. DO NOT: Drink and drive. ‘Nuff said.
5. DO NOT: Wear a wife beater, ever. Guys…really. Keep them under the shirts, they are not the least bit attractive.
6. DO NOT: Cheat on your boyfriends/girlfriends. Yes you’re in a house with 10 or more people partying your asses off, but this is NOT The Real World.
7. DO: SAVE THE DRAMA FOR YOUR MOMMA. This is Spring Break. Let’s not forget it’s a vacation. No one cares if you #2 or #9, or if you #6…should’ve listened to me.
8. DO NOT:Hook up with any of the people in your Spring Break group. Things could get very awkward. Though it may feel like it for a week or so, you are NOT on the Jersey Shore. If you’re Ronnie and Sammie, you can ignore this one, rules don’t apply for you. BUT be sure to #6, #7, and #9. And only Ronnie can #5.
9. DO NOT: Fight with your boyfriend/girlfriend. If you are on Spring Break with your significant other do not fight. If you’re one of those couples that will break up and get back together 8 different times in a 7 day trip, keep that to the bedroom or I can almost guarantee the rest of your group will banish you to the nasty part of Panama City. Once again, #7. Oh and for heavens sake no #6. That would just be plain rude.
10. DO:Bring suntan lotion…and use it. Being tan is hot and all, but there is a fine line between bronzed and beautiful and a red hot lobster. SPF is your friend.
11. DO NOT: Drink to excess. Spring Break is a time to party but let’s not spend half the trip in bed with a hangover from hell. We all know that only Bradley Cooper makes a hangover look hot. On that note, if your Fake ID is made of cardboard, chances are you will get caught and arrested and spend a few hours in jail while your friends continue to party. Don’t be stupid, the po po are PUMPED for the upcoming few weeks.
12. DO NOT: Take drinks from random guys, unless you wanna wake up like Stu, Alan and Phil. If so watch out for Mr. Chow…..Sooo Long Gay Boyssssssss! But for real, don’t do it, you’re smarter than that.
13. DO: Pack wisely. That doesn’t mean bring your entire closet “just incase” you will not need those overalls from that one mixer. Keep in mind that it is only March and chances are you won’t be able to walk around half naked. It won’t be all that warm, plus why would you want to? Keep it classy and keep it comfortable. You shouldn’t have to be worried about a nip slip or other wardrobe malfunction. You’ll thank me when you see how everyone else is dressed and how pathetic they look. Keep your clothes on girls. Guys…you too.
14. DO: Bring enough money. Budget yourself. If you’re one of those people that HAVE to have a million trinkets and souvenirs from vacation recognize that you’re probably going to spend/waste a lot of money. Also, if you love to eat (who doesn’t) you’re screwed. Chances are you will spend over $100 on food. Try to eat at your house; you’ll save tons of money, plus you and your house will bond over nightly dinners. Keep in mind the covers for bars or clubs and how much you will spend out each night. Plan on needing some emergency cash since you never know what can happen on Spring Break. Oh and always keep a few extra dollars in your pocket for ice cream. Duh.
15. DO: BE SAFE. Apply the buddy system, sounds corny but deal. You are officially leaving the bubble of High Point University and not everyone out there is as extraordinary as us. Don’t leave your laptops out, this isn’t Slane. Lock up your room, this isn’t the Complex. If you venture off to go shopping bring your phone and NEVER wander off drunk alone. Are you stupid? Didn’t think so. If there’s 16 people in your group, please come home with 16. You’ve all heard those horror stories about Spring Break and not to be a negative Nancy here but it could happen to any of us too. Do I really have to say it? PROTECT YOURSELF….in every way possible. Oh and no townies…ew.
MOST IMPORTANTLY DO: Have fun! You’re only in college once so enjoy it while you can.
Hope Spring Break 2012 is amazing for all of you! Post below if you have any ideas that you think were left out of the do’s and donts of a college Spring Break!