I recently went to my primary school class reunion and a lot of my friends were surprised when I mentioned it to them. Many of them had never had the planned reunion, or if they had, they either didn’t go or they had a really awkward time making small talk with people they barely remembered from ten years ago. I’d lost the matching ring we all bought before leaving primary school, and I’d lost touch with almost everyone in our class ages ago, but regardless of that, or maybe because of it, I was curious to go and see how everyone’s lives had turned out since we parted ways. I didn’t have high expectations but I ended up being really glad I went. Here are some things I learned.
Growing up is a good thing.
Juggling overwhelming coursework, worrying about rent and bills, and desperately trying to figure out what I want to do with my life sometimes combine to make me feel like having to be a grown-up is the most awful thing that could ever happen to a person, my adult life stretching out in front of me as an endless tunnel of stress and taxes. All of this is still pretty new to me, and the sheer overwhelmingness of it all can easily obscure all the good things about growing up. Talking to my former classmates and reminiscing about all the stupid stuff we did in primary school really put things into perspective and highlighted how far we’ve all come in ten years, how time has molded us into better versions of the people we were then.
The school system is way too gendered.
Sitting in a restaurant with my former classmates, it (obviously) felt totally natural to chat with everyone and sit next to whoever happened to be there, regardless of their gender. Back in the day though, things were very different. It was all about girls vs. boys, separate PE and even crafts lessons, and I couldn’t have imagined being friends with the boys in our class even though they now seemed like a perfectly decent bunch. In hindsight I find it disturbing that gender was such a big deal for us tiny children, and I’m not sure I can really explain where that came from. But I do know that the new guidelines encouraging Finnish schools and teachers to be more gender neutral are a positive step forward. Girls and boys shouldn’t, at age 7, feel that they are somehow inescapably, fundamentally, different, and can’t do the same things or even sit next to each other in the classroom. That’s stupid, and that’s not how real life works.
“Do what you love” is cliché but true.
So many of my classmates were still doing the things they loved as kids and it was great to see how they had held on to their passions and found success, whether it was a hobby they had or a job they’d dreamed of one day doing. As for myself, I’ve sometimes doubted my decision to study English at university instead of something that would make me instantly employable after graduation, but thinking back to primary school and the genuine excitement I felt in English class, my choice of field was not just obvious but right for me, too. As I said earlier, perspective is a great thing.
If you have a class reunion coming up, I would definitely recommend going. If your school years were a happy time, it’ll be fun to remember all those good things, and if school was less than amazing for you, a class reunion is a great opportunity to see just how far you’ve come and how much you have grown. Your former classmates will be happy to see you there, trust me.