Every collegiette out there is familiar with this bitter emotion that lurks behind us after a breakup or an unsuccessful job application: rejection. Since the majority of our failures are nothing more than a form of rejection, we here at Her Campus Helsinki have brought together a few pieces of advice to help you bounce back to your normal everyday life.
1. Don’t take it personally
Let’s face it: timing isn’t always on our side. Your crush might turn you down simply because they are facing their own personal challenges that have nothing to do with you. If your job application didn’t work this time, it might be because they already have enough staff as it is. Therefore, avoid second-guessing your abilities and personality, since many rejections have more to do with timing than with you.
2. Dump your fears
Are you familiar with the term “self-fulfilling prophecy”? A self-fulfilling prophecy is a false conception associated with a situation that makes us act in a way that the false conception comes true. For instance, you might fear that your best friend is rejecting you, so you become more and more defensive over time. In the end, this kind of behavior in fact causes the feared rejection to happen. Remember that your feelings aren’t always entirely truthful, so try questioning them every now and then.
3. Listening is the key
Next time you come across a refusal, try focusing your attention on the reason for the rejection. This way you don’t miss out on a possible second chance that might be waiting behind the corner. If you know you didn’t get your dream job because of timing, try again later! Also, try asking questions to better understand the reasons behind rejection. By doing so, you get more and more creative in coming up with alternative solutions.
4. Never stop trying
It might take twenty bitter “Nos” to get one perfect “Yes”. The trick is to never stop trying, since the only way to reach your goals is to be consistent and self-assured. Sure, many successful people make it look so easy, but know that behind every accomplishment are not only sweat and tears but also strong and undaunted people who are in the end just like you and me.
5. Take a deep breath and move on
But no matter what happens, remember that rejections and misfortunes, just like triumphs and joys, are all part of life. Life always has a way of sorting itself out and sometimes what may seem like a missed opportunity might actually turn out to be a blessing in disguise, and oftentimes things are simply not meant to be. So don’t be encouraged, learn to embrace both the ups and downs in life and keep moving forward.