We have all been there, whether it be love or like, we have all wanted someone that we can’t have. Maybe it is the Starbucks worker you see every day, your classmate, the star athlete of the football team, or even your best friend. Either way, you can’t have them. The most important question is, WHY can you not have them? Is it because they are in a relationship? Is it because you are too shy to talk to them? Is it because you don’t want to ruin your friendship? Is it because you fear rejection? If you answered yes to any of these, keep reading. If you didn’t … WELL you made it this far soooo, keep reading.
Because YOU are too shy.
First of all, I am curious to know how you may possibly be in love with someone who you are too shy to talk too. Did you stalk their Instagram? Mutual friend who tells you all their deepest darkest secrets? I am intrigued, but of course there is absolutely no judgment from this end.
Here is my advice to you: it is okay to be shy, but do not let the shyness be a deciding factor on getting the person you want. This is someone you CAN have, trust me. You are most definitely a bada$$ b*tch and you need to flaunt it. The next time you see this person, take a deep breath and walk up to him or her. Introduce yourself and ask for his or her number. This is the 21st century, people, and us girls are here to claim our dominance in the dating world. You do NOT need to wait for someone to notice you and ask for your number, because you have ~obviously~ noticed them. It is time you set that shy excuse aside and go get who you want. OKURRRRR.
Because THEY are in a relationship.
I cannot tell you how many times I have seen the most beautiful people to walk this world and finally get the courage to talk to them and they say, “I have a girlfriend.” First of all, how DARE you have a girlfriend? Second of all, she is VERY lucky. And third of all, NOW I am embarrassed because I walked in with so much confidence ready to change your whole life and here you are, with a girlfriend. Damn it.
My advice to you, whether this person is in a happy and healthy relationship or not, there is nothing you can do about it other than seek out another hot single individual. Do not waste your time hoping they break up, because if you were that person’s girlfriend, you would not want someone wishing that you guys broke up. Do not be that person who tries to break them up either… no one likes that person and it is not worth the time and energy. Now, if three months from now he or she is single, GURLLLL you better shoot your shot. But don’t wait for that to happen, because you could be waiting years and that will only affect you. You do not want to wait for someone when you should be living your BEST life.
Because YOU do not want to ruin your friendship.
Oh, I see, I see. You fell in love with your best friend. BEEN there, DONE that. If you think about it, it makes sense, you probably hang out with this person A LOT. They understand and know who you are as a person. They would never try to change who you are, even if that person is slightly annoying at times. It was bound to happen, honestly. Haven’t you seen a RomCom before like… ever? Your life just turned into one, and there is no escaping it now.
My advice to you is to not hold in these unspoken feelings for your friend. They are bound to explode one day, so in order to save yourself from that disastrous emotion filled roller coaster, go talk to him or her. Like, RIGHT NOW. What have you got to lose? “I do not want to lose my best friend.” Well in reality, if they are mature and they do not feel the same way, they will still be your friend, and nothing would be awkward. What if they feel the same way? You are both just sitting there too scared to confess your feelings that just happen to be mutual. Honestly, shoot your shot, you win some and you lose some, but this is one you can DEFINITELY win.
Because YOU fear rejection.
Hmmmmm. All I can say about this, is if you fear rejection, you are going to be living under a rock for your whole life. You are going to get rejected more than a hundred of times in your life, but that is a part of life. You honestly cannot win at everything in life, even if you were the luckiest person in this world, you would still lose sometimes. Unless you are one of those people that takes everything as a win, because you are able to see the upside of every single situation… but then again, if you were that person, you wouldn’t fear rejection.
My advice to you, GO SHOOT YOUR SHOT. Shoot it, and if you get rejected, take a step back and think, “Who is really losing here? Me, the boss a$$ b*tch? Or them, the person who wasn’t even willing to give such an amazing woman a chance?” The answer will ALWAYS be them. Remember your worth and remember that in life, we all get rejected, but it is how we handle that rejection that makes us who we are.