“Can all the females in the room raise their hands?”
My arm shot straight through the air, fist clenched as if I were shattering the glass ceiling.
“Only one out of eleven males! What (#SeparateBut) equal distribution!”
The guys around me shuffled in their seats, visibly uncomfortable with the gender dichotomy underscored by the On Harvard Time moderator. I felt my hand hesitantly return to my lap, clutching an invisible shard.
Hosted by the student-run Internet comedy news show, the First Annual Undergraduate Council (UC) Freshman Campaign Forum disseminated a disconcerting commentary on the female political paradigm at Harvard.
I had announced my candidacy–as representative of one of four freshman yards at Harvard– in the form of a shameless #Flawless beanie, Aisha–Queen ‘14 stickers, and a Beyonce-inspired platform promising:
1) Better quality toilet paper (for after students are #DrunkInLove)2) Increased (#Surf) Board Plus 3) Monthly Yoncé Yard Parties4) Longer office hours and more time slots to visit President Drew Faust (and her #Beygency).
The campaign garnered the attention of The Crimson, a shoutout in The Boston Globe, and a free Pumpkin Spice Latte (#BeyHasHerBasicDays) from an amused barista; it did not, unfortunately, secure my ascendance to the throne. As a matter of fact, none of the four girls running in Ivy Yard won. In an election cycle during which only one in four candidates running was female –the greatest gender disparity in candidate declarations in five years–student constituents must wonder, why? On a campus brimming with political ambition, with aspiring Hillary’s, why are females disinclined to serve as student representatives? Is patriarchal, systemic oppression a disease in the UC that requires an upgrade?
When asked by the On Harvard Time moderators about Professor Steven Pinker’s suggestion that females have lower spatial reasoning skills, about the phallic statue in Widener Library, about guys trying to Monica Lewinski all on my (#blue) gown, I was grateful to the satirical approach for making me cognizant. Cognizant of the politicization of gender, of humor’s role in underscoring social truths, of the need to motivate females to politically contend, enabling equitable gender perspectives during UC discussions on our sexual assault policy.
While I cannot officially claim the title ‘Queen’ of (#Blue) Ivy Yard, I will fight for Harvard–upholding veritas, advocating for gender equity, ensuring pretty never hurts– as fiercely as Solange fought Jay-Z on that elevator.
#BowDown.