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Sexual Abstinence in a Relationship

It’s no secret that most relationships in 2017 revolve around sex, but there are still some couples that wait until marriage and that’s okay. It seems that most people today feel that in order for their relationship to thrive sex is needed. But why is that? Why does society have this perception that waiting until marriage is whack?

That’s when I realized, SOCIAL MEDIA. With social media now having a big impact on the actions of people it’s easy to see why. Whenever I go on Twitter there’s always “mood” post on my timeline or post about “what a woman should be doing in order to keep her man,” but why is that? Is it because people feel that without sex their relationship has no substance? In fact, many relationships do end because one partner doesn’t respect the decision of the others sexual abstinence.

Some say that the negatives of waiting are just too risky, but are they really? Not knowing if you’re going to be sexually compatible with your significant other is not scary. If you’re meant to be you will find a way to deal with each other’s sexual attitudes. Feeling you have to be experienced enough for your future wife/husband is not a good reason to have sex. Once you meet that person they will accept who you are. If you are not experienced they will not divorce you nor judge you because they married you for [you]! People love to say that once you have sex you’re going to want to experience it with other people. However, that argument confuses me because if your reason for having sex while in a relationship is to please the needs of your significant other, why are you worrying about pleasing others?

Now [you] a person who wanted to wait till marriage, but compromised so you would not feel selfish is now left hurt. Waiting until marriage would not only allow you to grow physically but mentally as well. You have the opportunity to learn how to communicate each other’s commitments and spirits which is important. If you cannot connect mentally, how do you expect to connect physically? With everything I have said, this piece is not meant to shame anyone only to promote the voice of sexual abstinence and let those who abstain from sex know they are not alone!

And always remember if you do have sex, “safe sex is the best sex!"


Raven Reaves-Jackson is currently a sophomore Journalism Major, Marketing Minor student at Hampton University. She is entertaining, thoughtful, adventuresome and has great aspirations of being an on-air talent. Raven enjoys reading and listening to podcasts on her downtime. In life, she aims to always have the best support for her family and peers. Raven believes that all good things take time and has big aspirations of starting her own non-profit organization in the future. 
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