Oh, the talk … the infamous talk. I know it can be difficult, awkward and uneasy talking to an adult about sex. However, that should not be the case. Talking about sex with parents, guardians, or other adults should not be an uncomfortable or an intimidating conversation. With these four tips and a little nudge, you’ll be ready to go through the conversation smoothly.
Tip 1: Remember that sex and intimacy is normal, without it you would not be here.
Yes, your parents have sex. Remembering this will help you know that it is not a big deal. They were once in the same position as you, had the same questions as you and were just as curious as you. Adults, parents and guardians are there to help, guide you and aid the questions, misconceptions and myths that you have. Your parents went through sex education, made mistakes regarding sex, and learned from them. They do not want you to go through the same situations they did and are there to help you. They have more knowledge than you think they do.
Tip 2: Be open and honest about feeling uncomfortable about speaking about sex.
Begin the conversation by being completely transparent. “I was hesitant to talk about sex with you because it makes me uncormfortable”. This will give the adult some insight into what is going on in your mind. It may lead them to let their guard down because they understand how you feel. The adult you’re talking to may have felt the same when they had questions about sex therefore, it will form a bond.
Tip 3: Know that they want the best for you.
I am sure that the adult, parent or guardian in question does not want you to end up with an STD, AIDS, or pregnant. Therefore, they will be open to answering your questions to prevent this. Go into the conversation aware that your parents want you to make the best and smartest decision. With their added knowledge, you will end up doing exactly that.
Tip 4: Be prepared with questions.
Starting off the conversation about sex can be a little awkward, however if you go in the conversation with a set list of questions it will definitely run smoothly. Make sure to have questions that are open ended so you get the answer you want and gain insight on how that adult feels. Having questions prepared beforehand will end that awkward silence and blank stare period.
Here are a list of questions to start off the conversation:
“How do I know when I’m ready for sex?”
“How does birth control work?”
“What are sexually transmitted diseases?”
“Will it hurt the first time?” “What are condoms and how are they used?”
“How do you feel about sex before marriage?”