With my sorority’s Semi-Formal coming up this week, my time as the chapter’s Formal Chair is drawing to a close. Semi will be the second event I have planned; the first was our Formal, which took place last April. Formal Chair in my chapter is an Executive Council position that is held over the course of a calendar year; and while it entails organizing only two events – far fewer than many other positions like Social or Sisterhood Chair – it is also one of the most challenging jobs. Being a sophomore in Greek life, I have now been to a handful of Formals and Semi-Formals, so I feel qualified to give advice on how to make the most of them: whether it is as an attendee or as a coordinator of the event itself.
What (Not) To Wear. Attire for Formal tends to be – you guessed it – much more formal than the dress code for Semi. Semi dresses tend to be more risqué: shorter, tighter, and more revealing. This year, a major trend is jewel tones with a sparkly touch – sequins, glitter, or something similarly festive. Formal is a little different. While some girls opt for a floor-length dress in a bright spring shade, I do not necessarily think that long dresses are a must. My personal rule is to base your outfit for Formal off of what you wore to Semi the previous fall: you want to step up your look, but you also do not want to overdress. For my freshman Semi, I wore a strapless blue cocktail dress and peep toe gold heels. For Formal, (my first event as Formal Chair), I wore a peach, one-shoulder knee-length dress with crystal accents – so my dress for Formal was a little more refined than my Semi dress. This is a pattern that a lot of girls seem to follow.
As for your date – Semi is definitely not the occasion for a three-piece suit and top hat. If your date happens to be that guy, tell him to save it for Formal. Most guys seem to wear dress pants and a button-down with a blazer for Semi, and a more traditional suit for Formal. (Of course, there are exceptions to this rule. I once saw someone’s date in a plaid and corduroy suit, so the “traditional” idea is obviously subject to personal taste, whether it is happens to be questionable or not). In terms of shoes, dress shoes are always a safe option, although I have heard cowboy boots once suggested as footwear, so to each their own. There is also sometimes a question of color coordination – my initial take on this was “Formal is not prom,” – but my Formal date and I ended up color coordinating and we actually got a lot of compliments.
The Date Question. Speaking of dates – one common question I get as Formal Chair is “Do you bring a date?” This tends to vary depending on who is holding the position. I have actually found it helpful to bring dates to both the Formal and the Semi that I planned. For Semi on Friday, my date is one of my best friends, so I know I can count on him to help things run smoothly…not to mention he has great fashion sense so our pictures will be fantastic. But the problem with bringing a date date (your crush) when you are Formal Chair is that this puts romantic pressure on you when you are already putting out fires left and right. From the food to dealing with the fact that the DJ doesn’t have “Call Me Maybe,” you are going to be busy, and this could result in your date awkwardly being left solo for most of the evening. Besides, you don’t need to worry about an extra person having fun when you are already running an entire event.
Anyway, more generally, if you do not have a boyfriend or someone you have been seeing, I would suggest bringing a friend or opting to go with a group of sisters instead. Some girls take the “setup” route, and while I am sure being set up with the friend of another sister could lead to a great potential love match, a lot of times it can end up just being awkward.
The Pregame. Now that you have your dress and your date, it is time to figure out your pre-event plans. In case you were not sure, people tend to go all out for Semis and Formals. While it may seem a little odd that attendees and their guests get so dressed up and then party so hard, this has been the case with every Semi and Formal I have ever attended. As Formal Chair, I am sober at my events, and I have always had a great time. But if you do plan on drinking, I would definitely say (as always) eat a full pre-Semi dinner first, and know your limits. I speak from experience when I tell you that your Formal Chair has put hours upon hours of work into this event, and you are going to want to be able to remember it the next day.
The Main Event. Semis and Formals are really special events. You are surrounded by your sisters, there is good music, fancy food, and you may even have a hot date. These parties are meant to recognize the chapter’s accomplishments of the semester, and to celebrate the fact that it is coming to a close. Semi is followed by finals and a month-long winter break, so it is often the last chance you may have to spend time with your closest friends all together – so indulge in the finger food, strike silly poses for pictures, and dance the night away. As Formal Chair, it is important to me that all of the work I put into Semi and Formal culminates in a memorable night that all of my sisters will enjoy. Seeing everyone have a good time makes the months of preparation and behind-the-scenes work well worth it.
In the end, whether you are attending your own chapter’s Semi or Formal, you are a guest to someone else’s, or you happen to be Formal Chair, these events are meant to be the social highlight of the semester, so do your best to enjoy and appreciate them.
Post-Semi and Formal Activities. Some people are post game people, and others are not.(Classic quote from a friend of mine: “When the party’s over, it’s over.”) But for the most part, following Greek Semis and Formals, attendees like to keep the party going. If you are someone’s date to their event, it is generally good form to go with them if they invite you to an after party. On the same note, it is generally not good form to ditch your date if they do not have an after party planned. While it is tempting to party on, there are other fun ways to end the night – from eating a hot dog from Manouch in your formalwear to hanging out with a few friends to recap the party. So try not to sweat it if you do not have big plans for the end of the night. As long as you are with your sisters or your date, you will have a good time.
And if you are Formal Chair, you will probably want to dive into your bed after the event and sleep for days. Or maybe you will want to make the most of the night and rally to get your own celebrating in. But either way, you will be content in the knowledge that you have thrown a fantastic party for your sisters.
I am actually a little bit sad to be passing on the Formal Chair torch. I know my successor will do a fantastic job – that is not the problem at all. But the closer it gets to my Semi, the more I have realized how much I have loved organizing these events for my sorority. I have gained so much from being in the chapter that being able to give back in this small way seems like the least that I can do. At the end of the day, I am proud of my Formal and I am sure that I will be proud of my Semi as well.
As a final note, my best advice is this: regardless of the dress, the date, the venue, or the food, try to remember what these parties are really about: celebrating your sisterhood, and making memories to last a lifetime. Now get out there and party the night away!