This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Gettysburg chapter.
Name: Stefan Dudley
Major(s)/Minor(s): Major: Psychology Minor: Neuroscience and Education
Year: 2018
Hometown: Redding, Connecticut
Activities/Hobbies: Frisbee, Photography, Video games
Astrological Sign: Cancer
Hogwarts House: Gryffindor (What the hell is a Hufflepuff?)
Relationship Status: Open (I’ll explain later)
Per Erica, “He kinda wanted to look like a goof ball, to really showcase our natural state.”
Q&A
Favorite TV show, movie, musical, and song: (You’re tearing me apart with this question) Game of Thrones, The Usual Suspects, Book of Mormon, and American Pie by Don McLean
What’s the number one thing you want to accomplish before graduating from Gettysburg? I always wanted to get back to playing the guitar and harmonica.
Before you die? I’m a big traveler, so I’d like to visit some of my favorite places in the world like Athens, Barcelona, Florence, St. Moritz (Switzerland), etc..
What’s it been like having Erica abroad this past semester? How have you dealt with the distance? Lonely. It has been very lonely without her here. Even though I have a great and wide network of friends to look to, I feel like a big part of me is missing right now (it certainly doesn’t help when people bring up Erica either). Technology makes it easier since we can keep in touch often; we text just about every day and Skype once every two weeks. I recently have been trying to push myself academically and physically in order to get her off my mind, but it’s difficult not to think about her. I feel kind of like a family dog that is stuck at home while the owner is out of the house.
Have you been keeping up with her series “An American Abroad?” I do read her articles when I have the spare time, although she gets mad at me when I correct her grammatical mistakes. I didn’t read her latest article, in order to avoid scolding (she’s still scary when she’s mad, even across the ocean; thank God she is not studying abroad in Germany, or else she would be really scary!).
Any tips for other couples dealing with study abroad? This is a tough question to answer since it depends on what other couples want to do. Before Erica left, she and I talked about having an open relationship while she was away because we agreed that we wouldn’t see each other for a while and that it made sense for us to keep our relationship open. Some people may question whether or not being in an open relationship is a good idea, and I would say that it is entirely up to a couple to decide what is right for them. In all honesty, I haven’t been looking for anyone to hook up with, I like just texting Erica until she gets back. Most people would probably be screaming at me, saying, “WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING? YOU GOT THE GOLDEN TICKET, AND YOU’RE RUINING THIS PERFECT OPPORTUNITY!” I would first tell them that their caps lock key is on, and then I would reply that, “The grass may be greener on the other side, but I’m a God damn good gardener and I love the grass that I do have!” (Erica is not a patch of grass, but you get the idea). My reasoning is that my parents were in an open relationship during college and much of their early careers because they would go months without seeing each other (they now have been married for over 30 years). To summarize, I’m not advocating for everyone to be in an open relationship while their significant other is abroad (it’s entirely possible to have a healthy exclusive relationship while one person is abroad or at a long distance), I would instead suggest that it would be wise to keep a strong communication with your partner about what you feel and think in order to see what’s right for your relationship. Communication is always the key to any successful relationship.